The Second Breaking Point
by Patirick
Summary: This is a growing up story for Ryoga. At length he accepts the truth about many things and seeks atonement for past misdeeds.
1. Forward and Prologue

The Second Breaking Point

"Great works are performed not by strength, but perseverance." Samuel Johnson

Foreword

First and foremost this story is a failure, not a great work by any means but certainly one of perseverance. This was my first attempt at a Ranma based story and I can safely say it is lacking on some fundamental levels despite my best attempts at editing. It feels contrived and character development is weak and rigid. 

Criticism is encouraged provided it's qualified. Don't tell me Ryoga is out of character without telling me why he is so for example. Useful criticism let's me know what to be careful of in the future and yes ideally improve. 

Disclaimer

I had no part in the creation of the characters used in the story. I am in awe of the talent that created them. In writing this I don't seek profit or make any claim on the genius that created this work; I only hope to mirror the enjoyment to others that I have received from the series. 

Purpose

One of the most interesting aspects of the series is how things are so careful balanced. It's like a huge clock with dozens of gears all swinging in a seeming random fashion, but somehow the clock continues to function. If but one character was to change his or her course then the carefully balanced interplay would all come tumbling down. My story is about one character finding this breaking point. 

Notes about Characters and Themes

Attempting to be mostly true to the themes of this series Ranma and Akane are destined to be together, if you don't agree with that pairing, turn back now or forever hold your peace. I haven't actually read the manga, (This particular problem is slowly being remedied) and thus I don't feel including characters or events in my story that I only know alittle about for fear I'd portray them starkly out of character. The major characters in this story will be Ryoga (as if you hadn't guessed from the title), Ranma, and Akane, though most of the other major characters will also show up in some form (Ukyo, Shampoo, Mousse, Happousai, Cologne, Dr. Tofu, Genma, Soun, Kasumi, Nabiki, Kuno, Sasuke, and Kodachi). The setting will be the day of the Christmas OVA (Ova 2), and it will assume all events in the anime, movies, and OVAs have occurred with the exception of that OVA (which occurs during the story). The events of OVA 2 are heavily drawn upon in the first chapter, but I recreate the story from Ryoga's eyes, any changes will be additive in nature; I won't remove anything that's already occurred. The rating of the story should match the original series, sometimes dark, sometimes waffy, and everything in between. 

Lastly I'd like to reiterate my goal is primarily to allow others to receive an extension of the enjoyment I have received from the series itself.

Prologue

*

"Love takes off masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within." - James Baldwin

*

Ryoga Hibiki cursed his destiny. Of all the weeks, even months, he had spent searching for the Tendo Dojo during his life; the one time he truly didn't want to find it, he had found it without any difficulty. The bitter irony gnawed at his soul. He darkly mused, _Much like my entire life._

He slowly put one foot in the front over the other, and worked his way around the house. The weariness in his body mirrored that in his soul. _You knew this wasn't going to be easy. You have no one to blame now but yourself. No more hiding._ As he reached the backyard he came to see his own reflection in the koi pond.

The thing that caught him most about himself were his eyes. They seemed so dark even in the early morning light. The bags under them were the only part of him that hinted that the suffering he had went through. The rest of his body was almost like in a zombie, crushed by his worn leather shoulder pads.

Slowly he gazed over to the house, and was greeted with an almost typical scene. Soun Tendo and Genma Saotome were deep in another game of shoji, as they always seemed to be. Neither even noticed his presence as they focused on watching the board so their opponent couldn't use nonstandard tactics. A slight smile almost formed on his face but failed to materialize. By nonstandard of course he meant cheat, but this was to be excepted from them; they didn't seem to change as time passed. Nabiki was reading a magazine, most likely business from his experience with her, but Ryoga couldn't truly see it to confirm his suspicion. She looked up as he arrived, doubtlessly plotting how she could turn the situation to her advantage. Her face was as emotionless as stone, save a faint smirk. _How many times had he seen this scene before?_ Kasumi was busy cooking breakfast, and Ryoga could already tell she was thinking of asking him to stay by the look in her eye. Kindness incarnate indeed. But what of...

Ranma's taunting voice shattered his reverie. "Heya Pchan, how'd you find your way here? It's been quite some time. Where'd you get the funny looking shoulder pads?" The smirk on Ranma's face pained Ryoga.

At first Ryoga struggled to even respond at all. He stood their motionless for a moment, a moment that seemed like an eternity. He looked at the young man standing before him and finally saw Ranma as if for the first time. Ranma was his oldest friend, maybe even his closest. _Why so much spite...no, no more games—not with myself. I know why._

Finally overcoming this wave of lassitude Ryoga managed to murmur as if in a trance "Ranma Saotome..." Ryoga slowly, wearily raised bamboo umbrella and he watched with some despair as Ranma crouched into a defense stance. _Predictable as I was myself._

Letting out a sigh, Ryoga simply stated, "Ranma, we need to talk. Just me, you, and Akane."


	2. Chapter One End of a World

Chapter 1 "End of a World"

*

"Most of our so-called reasoning consists in finding arguments for going on believing as we already do."

James Robinson

*

As Ryoga waited for Ranma to find Akane, he relived his nightmare, but also his salvation in a strange sense. These memories had formed a maelstrom that had engulfed him. There was no escape. He was lost not in reality but in his mind. _Truly, I am the lost boy now, aren't I? Lost my way, lost my chance, lost my mind._ Time seemed to slow down in the past weeks began to replay themselves as they had countless times before. In the span of a few instants everything that had brought him to the Tendo's doorstep flashed before his eyes.

The day it all had begun had started like so many other days before it. Ryoga had been traveling on one of his endless journeys. He struggled to remember exactly what he had been doing, but it was blurred beyond recognition. It hardly mattered anymore, they all had the same purpose. He wasn't trying to find his way to this destination or that destination, but rather to find his way in life. Invariably it led him back to Ranma as it did that day. _It was cold I remember that now. The last day before Christmas and the Tendo's great Christmas party._

He remembered clearing seeing Ranma and Akane walking to school. It was simple but elegant. She walked on the sidewalk with the grace he'd seen a thousand times, and Ranma of course balanced himself perfectly on the narrow fence along the canal. The entire walk to school seemed almost timeless in his mind. He couldn't hear what they were saying, but suddenly Akane moved forward and made a mock swing at Ranma. Ranma dodged out of the way easily. Akane said something, the only word of which Ryoga caught was "Late" and they both hastened their step.

_I won't allow him to make her upset. Not this time. _Ryoga thought as he charged forth. Just when he began to utter his battle cry, a splash of cold water hit him suddenly.

"Bwwe" was all he managed to squeal.

An elderly woman was sprinkling water at her gate. Ryoga recalled this was known as Misogi. Supposedly it was a ritual to remove sin and pollution from body and mind, usually performed in the morning and evening. _Typical Hibiki luck. Ranma you've been spared for now, but you won't get away with this, _he vowed cursing Ranma for his poor fortune.

After changing back from his cursed form, Ryoga spent hours trying to find his way and finally wandered into a yard before a great building. _Maybe it's a school or museum_, he mused_. It looks strangely familiar but from where!?_ A huge crowd of young people, by their uniforms students, obstructed his view at first, but with some quick side stepping Ryoga managed to gain a better look. The students had no interest to him expect he recognized faces of Ukyo and Akane. _I've found the right school at last!_

Ukyo stood on one side of the crowd, a small clearing had opened up between her in the crowd as if the crowd was bound by some unseen pact. She stood over a grill in her usual uniform. Ukyo was cooking okonomiyaki. It had to be okonomiyaki. _That smell is much too familiar, and besides what else does Ukyo ever cook? _There was a suave and confidant aura about Ukyo that was almost infecting. A quick flick of her wrist and she had turned the okonomiyaki over with the small spatula she held in her hand.

Akane was much the opposite of Ukyo. She stood almost half crouched over her grill on the other side of the crowd, again a small clearing forming around her. Each action was a performed in an almost awkward manner as compared to Ukyo's grace. Akane constantly would glance at the recipe that was on a stool, off to her right. What she was cooking had a particular odor that Ryoga could not quite place. It almost smelled like Ukyo's but something was awry. Akane's face was a mask of determination; the strain was very visible to Ryoga. _She's trying so hard. _All Ryoga could do was let out a sigh at first.

He fumed the more the reality of the situation donned on him. Akane and Ukyo were obviously in wasting all their energy and attention on Ranma. The rage washed over Ryoga like the sun's tirelessly rays itself. And the wretch was no where to be seen. But he could be heard.

Focusing Ryoga picked Ranma's voice out from the crowd. A small wooden table stood before Ryoga. Ranma was seated, though trying to rise. Kuno stood like a great tree planted firmly in front of the young Saotome.

"Nay Saotome, today this shall be settled. As long as every day may last and as bright as the sunlight may be, every day will end, and so shall this travesty of justice end. I the great and powerful heir to the house of Kuno..." Kuno said his voice droning onward, but Ryoga had stopped listening.

The relief on Ranma's face was evident. Using Ryoga as an excuse he sidestepped Kuno and rose to me his rival. Kuno openly scowled. 

"Hey Ryoga, long time no see?" Ranma said walking towards him with hands raised in such an obviously false greeting of friendship that it made Ryoga sick. Ranma moved his arms forward and Ryoga instinctively pushed him away.

Before Ryoga could say a single word, Ukyo had grabbed one of Ranma's arms gently, balancing her plate of okonomiyaki perfectly with the other hand. Akane had clasped on to Ranma's other arm with a death grip it seemed and how she balanced our plate Ryoga would never understand. Ranma was guided back to his seat, dismay enshrouding his features.

"Well, Ranchan, it's time for you to make a decision..." Ukyo began as she set her plate of okonomiyaki down on the table.

"Ranma, end this please." The first three words betrayed a vexed tone, but the last word was almost pleading. This momentarily stunned Ryoga into just observing. Like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming vehicle, Ryoga was enthralled.

"Look if you ask me this is a stupid idea. What does this solve?! Nothing!" Ranma stuttered as he finally freed himself of both fiancées

"Saotome, decisions have fair reaching implications, much like a wave of the briny ocean. They maybe icy cold or fiery hot, but inevitably they must be one of the two. It is the fate of all true men to make a stand, and even as unprepared and unready a man as you must make a choice...!" Kuno began. Ryoga openly scowled at Kuno's words..._Choice? You are the last person to lecture on that..._

Ryoga found a rage burning up within him. _How dare Ranma? How dare he! So many guys would die to have the attention of one girl and he has TWO vying for him! I won't allow it! _A quick glance showed both his fiancées were quietly waiting for his decision. 

"How dare you..." he bellowed, "treat Akane poorly.", mumbling the second part.

"Now, wait here...this wasn't my idea..." Ranma began.

"I don't want to you hear you pathetic excuses..." he growled.

"There not excuses, it's the tru.."

Ryoga's response was a guttural war cry. He struck low, but Ranma had already somersaulted out of his chair and had landed a few steps backwards clear of the attack. The crowds of students fell back, some fleeing into the building or at least to a respectable distance to watch. In an instant a wooden bokken had struck Ryoga's head. The entire world went black for a moment, but quickly flashed back. Ryoga found his face in the ground, and slowly willed himself to his feet, but at this moment he was steam rolled by a bicycle.

Looking up, Ryoga saw it was none other than Shampoo. The lavender haired Amazon had a container of which was undoubtedly ramen. _She didn't even realize she ran over me!_

"Nii hao Ranma!"

"He's mine, only someone as noble as a member of the house of Kuno could ever hope to defeat a fiend as treacherous as the vile Saotome." Kuno stated with pride. "Come back here, you cretin! Stand still and take your beating with honor!" Kuno yelled as he chased Ranma. 

"Vile am I? Cretinous?" Ranma questioned, "That's it, I've had it." With lighting speed, Ranma turned to Kuno and with his first targeted kick he knocked Kuno's bokken from his hand. Before Kuno could as much as react, the second one sent Kuno into unconsciousness. 

Ranma turned to his would be fiancées and yelled angrily, "I am not a prize to be won! Does anyone care how I feel about all this? On this day too!" He turned his back to them and fled the schoolyard._ What's special about today? Ryoga mused._

Ukyo balancing a plate of okonomiyaki with one hand, took off after him. "Ranchan, please wait!"

Shampoo pursued the young martial artist as well with steaming ramen in hand. "Wait for Shampoo, Ranma."

After both were out of earshot, Ryoga swore he heard Akane say "Stupid dummy. Why can't you just end this..."

Ryoga tried to struggle to his feet again, but couldn't. _I've been hurt worse than this before, and continued to fight. Physically I've pushed myself to the breaking point and always survived. What's wrong with me now?_

"Ryoga, are you ok?" Akane said, sympathy lining her voice.

"Umm...yes." he muttered pathetically. _I can't let Akane see my weakness. I won't let her down._

Ryoga rose to his feet throwing off darkness and doubt. He wiped weakly at his face clearing the dirt. An awkward pause passed between the two people remaining on the grounds of the school.

"Are you sure? Here, let me help you clean up." She replied softly as pulled a damp cloth from her cooking supplies and applied it to his face.

Ryoga froze as she touched his face with the rag. _I can't look into her eyes or I am lost. I think I've ruined everything here. _He suddenly found the ground by his feet a very interesting place to stare at.

"Akane I..." he started. _Just say it!, _his mind urged!

"Yes, Ryoga?"

"I am...well...I am sorry." _I am a coward...why can't I just say those three little words..._

"Oh, it's not a big deal."

"I shouldn't have gotten involved, I just lost my temper."

"Oh, it's Ranma's fault. It's always his fault." 

Ryoga paused after her words for a moment. _It's always his fault. Yes, it is isn't it? Or could that be wrong..._ For whatever reason, Ryoga couldn't connect the two for just a moment. But only for that moment, _Yes, of course it is._.

Akane turned to her plate of food and let out a slight sigh.

"What am I going to do with all this food now?" she stated simply. 

"I could eat it if you don't mind, so well you don't have to throw it away..." he stammered, emitting a weak laugh at the end and raising one arm behind his head.

"Of course I'd like that very much." She said sweetly.

"At least it won't go to waste." I wish Ranma would eat my cooking like you do." As he ate the food, a faint smile played across her lips. _It's not so bad really_, he thought, trying to convince himself. _It's a privilege to be so blessed._

Why on earth would she want Ranma to eat her food!? He mused. _That rude and insensitive jerk. He doesn't deserve a girl as kind as Akane! _Suppressing his rage, he thought, "_Why did she say that...unless she truly likes him! No, that couldn't be. They argue all the time...they fight so much, they must hate each other. It is their parents..._Wanting to believe something true, eased his mind.It was all he could do to prevent himself from sighing. _Is she jealous?._

"Akane, I need to go." _I am not wanted around here. I have no right to be here anymore._

"Actually I need to ask you something." Akane began, turning slightly away from him.

"What is it?" Ryoga said blankly.

"I know what you've been trying to hide. You are a lot like Ranma." She replied innocently.

"Err...umm..what..d-do..y-you..mean?" _She knows I am doomed! Maybe if I throw myself at her mercy..._

"You don't have much family...Ranma isn't very close with his either." Akane explained.

"F-Family...of course." He babbled, again laughing maniacally. 

"Ryoga, Kasumi is going to have a Christmas party tonight. Everyone is coming." She smiled so sweetly as she said it, Ryoga stood dumbfounded.

"I-I... really...don't want to...impose." He stuttered. _I am not dead. I can't believe it!_

"Ryoga, I know how you don't have any family...no one deserves to be alone this time of year. Please come." She said slipping an invitation into his hand as she spoke. _Not like I could find my family if I wanted to, now of all times. She pities me. I can't stand for that..._

"I guess I could try to show up." He managed to say weakly. _I am such a weakling and a coward._

"Anyway, I need to get going to deliver the rest of the invitations." She said and waved and departed.

"Good bye Akane." Ryoga replied, awestruck. _I thought I was dead for sure. _He slowly raised one hand in front of his face. Then Ryoga pinched himself. _I guess I am awake._

Ryoga peered at the little pink invitation with his name on it. _What intricate little letters that spell out my name, _Ryoga mused. _Akane said everyone, I wonder who all will show up...wait she said today! I have to follow here or I'll never get there on time!_

"Akane..." he called out in vain because she had already gone. Ryoga panicked and broke out into a dead run. After several minutes of running Ryoga slowed down and let out a loud sigh. He was in a business district with many shops of various sorts, mostly displaying gifts for the Christmas season. _Gifts?! Of course! How could I forget!?_ _I'll need to get a gift for Akane._

Ryoga stopped by a small store purchase a simple but elegant golden ring. He had it wrapped in paper was white with gray stripes and a golden ribbon held the gift together. _This will make my intentions clear. If only she'll take it..._

But how do I find my way? Maybe I better read the directions on the invitation. As he thought he started to walk. Ryoga balanced the gift in one hand and invitation in the other.

As he walked he read aloud, "Tendo family Christmas party, time six o'clock." _Well, at least I have plenty of time to get there still. If it doesn't take three days like usual..._

"Place Tendo Anything Goes Training Hall." _Well, that doesn't help too much. I've never found the Dojo except by chance._

"Purpose the exchange of Christmas gifts." _At least I've gotten that part done._

Suddenly the youth found himself at the doorstep to the Tendo Dojo! 

"It's miracle, I can't believe," he exclaimed, "I made it all the way to Akane's house without getting lost. Ah, could this be love guiding me onward...I just know it..."

Suddenly something flattened Ryoga and the world went black. His last thoughts were, _I knew it was too good to be true, just my luck._ When he regained consciousness Nabiki escorted him Sasuke, Mousse, and Kuno to the men's waiting room that just happened to be Akane's room. _I am a guest, I won't make a scene about it. Besides it didn't even really hurt that much. I am so lucky to even be here._

"We are still getting ready, so you all be good boys and wait here." Nabiki said with the grace of a politician, and deftly closed the door behind here.

"So this is the bedchamber of Akane Tendo." Kuno announced.

"Just being in this sacred place of sends chills down my spine." Kuno's manservant, Sasuke murmured to himself. The servant began to slowly take in the room and walked over to a bulletin board. _I agree this place is almost holy. I feel blessed just being here._

"Hmm...What's this? Oh, look master a picture of your eminence." _Bah, that can't be right._

"For where is any author in the world, teaches such beauty as a woman's eye. She must love me well." Kuno stated with pride.

"Master you're not the only in the picture. Actually I can barely make you out." Sasuke noted, squinting. _Ha, I knew it wasn't that._

"Perhaps my autograph well serve as a memoir of my visit here." Kuno bragged, brandishing a marker. _I will not allow it! _With a quick stab of his red bamboo umbrella, Ryoga deftly disarmed Kuno of the marker.

"I am not going to sit here and allow you to defile Akane's room." Ryoga stated coldly. _I'd like to see a klutz like Kuno stand a chance against me. He only got lucky early. _

"And who might you be, to give orders to the great Tatewaki Kuno. Very well challenge and learn." Kuno said trying to maintain his suave exterior and raising from the ground.

"Looks like words aren't enough." Ryoga retorted raising to his full height.

Ryoga heard Mousse say something, but he didn't make it out. _I won't let him beat me this time. I just need to stay focused._

"Stay out of this duck boy." Ryoga said, brushing Mousse aside.

Ryoga saw Mousse get knocked down, and met Kuno's bokken blow for blow with his umbrella. Suddenly Mousse rose and several chains enwrapped the three of them as the tumbled out a window and straight into the koi pond.

Kuno was knocked unconscious, and both he and Mousse were trapped into their cursed forms, a duck and a pig. Quickly the two cursed animals moved to correct this problem before the party started. As they took a bath the undo their curses, Mousse and Ryoga talked idly. Ryoga was mostly daydreaming through it. 

Ryoga overhead a conversation while he was daydreaming. He noticed Mousse had heard it too. _I need to help..Akane, _Ryoga thought as he half emerged from his daydream. Ryoga raced towards Kasumi with Mousse following close behind.

"Kasumi, I'll get the soy sauce for you." Ryoga stated eagerly still dreaming of helping Akane.

Ryoga was so engrossed in his conversation that he missed some interplay between Mousse and Shampoo. Suddenly Shampoo splashed Mousse with some cold water. Kasumi moved to get her belongs together.

"Where's err ehh Akane? Ryoga asked.

"Shall we go now, Ryoga." Kasumi replied simply.

"We? Are you coming too Kasumi?" Ryoga said, still not realizing that Akane was no where to be seen. 

"Yes, I may remember something I've forgotten to get." Kasumi stated.

Kasumi walked at a brisk rate next to Ryoga. She held Mousse in duck form, with a bag to carry the soy sauce in the other. As they walked suddenly Kasumi started talking.

"I was wandering, do you live very far away?" she questioned innocently.

__

Ack! Anything but directions. I have no clue where my house is! I guess I'll tell her what I know.

"I live somewhere where you can see Mt Fuji from the west window, it's located someplace near the Pacific ocean I think." Ryoga managed at last, slightly rambling.

"Goodness, you must live in a very large house." Kasumi commented still lost in her rose colored world.

"Well, not really, but sometimes it sure seems that way to me." Ryoga replied with all honesty.

Suddenly the three of them came to a huge wall.

"Oh, my." 

"Huh?"

"Goodness, when did they put a dead end here?" 

"Where did they hide the market?" Ryoga exclaimed! _I don't want my lack of direction to ruin this event! Surely Kasumi can find her way._

"Quack," Mousse quacked as he flew above the wall.

"He's right with a duck's eye view we'll be able to locate it!" Ryoga cheered. _Thank you Mousse, we'll win the day yet._

"My what a clever duck." Kasumi said sweetly.

"This way you say?" Ryoga stated, pointing directly into the dead end.

__

I am not going to let a measly wall stand in my way. No way, no how. Ryoga reached out with his mind's eye...

"Bakusai-ten-ketsu!" he yelled, and the wall crumbled before him.

"So shall we go?" Ryoga said beaming.

After locating the soy sauce and returning to the dojo, Ryoga and Mousse began to help to set up for the musical performance. When the performance finally arrived Ryoga took control over one bank of lights and Mousse the other. He looked at the five girls, well if you counted Ranma five anyway, as the pulled open the curtain. Akane was directly in the middle, the center of his world as well. When Akane began to sing, Ryoga's mind began to idly wander. _She's so wonderful...I'll just pretend she is singing to me. I've just got to give this gift to her. _Ryoga sighed. _Why can't I remain focused on it._

After the performance Ryoga wandered around the party and eventually found himself in a huge card game, but he still couldn't find his focus. He looked longingly down at his gift and though, _"I've got to think of way to get Akane alone." _As the players announced their cards, Ryoga stated "I've got three of a kind," his mind on things besides cards.

Nabiki announced that the gift exchange was about to begin. It seemed so sudden. _I guess it is getting late._ Suddenly there was a loud outburst and Ryoga ignored it and used the chance to slowly creep up behind Akane. _I've got to build my nerve up, this is it, do or die. If I can give her this gift, she'll know how I feel. Come on Ryoga, it's not that hard, just do it._

Suddenly Akane rushed toward him. Concern traced her face, but Ryoga was oblivious to it. _This is it, Ryoga do or die._

"Eh Akane...eh..." he started moving his gift forward as she approached. Akane trapped in her own little world, rushed past Ryoga without as much as an acknowledgement of his existence.

__

Die. That's what I just did. She didn't even know I was alive. I failed utterly. Completely.

The familiar grip of depression slowly washed over him. The seconds became minutes and he stood like a derelict of another age. _I won't surrender...I can still give her the gift!_ _I'll see if I can focus on her voice. I can hear it..._he thought focusing in on her words and those to who she was talking. What he heard surprised him. Sounds were being echoed through a ventilation shaft. If he stood still he could barely make out the words being said. _She's above me. _He turned slightly to move, but was paralyzed by what he heard.

"Ranma," Akane said with surprise in her voice.

"Akane," Ranma replied the surprise echoing in his voice. There was a slight pause, Ryoga strained to hear everything that was said.

"Are you still mad?" Ranma questioned.

"No I am not," she replied softly.

"Yes, you are Akane."

"I am not mad." Akane replied with a slight hint of anger.

"Oh really," Ranma replied with the sarcasm creeping into his voice.

"Nope," she said evenly, "Here, it's for you. Kinda of a Christmas present it's not very fancy but..." Akane replied, with just a trace of concern in her voice.

Ukyo suddenly rushed back into the party room. She crossed the floor and walked right up to Ryoga. He turned his gaze still focusing on the words being said.

"Ryoga, have you seen..." she started.

"Listen," Ryoga stated with a hint of frustration that he was missing the conversation and he put a finger to his lips and then focused on the voice. He pointed at the ventilation shaft and mimed a listening gesture. Shampoo also had slipped in and picked up on what he had found. _Funny how we all are so similar with our vastly different training._

"It's scarf...lamebrain I made it myself," Akane said with her anger covering her hurt. Ryoga risked a glance at Ukyo and noticed she was eavesdropping too. Shampoo had likewise followed suit.

"Oh, Akane, we both know you're all thumbs, but here you insist on..." Ranma started, then he paused. _He must be examining it..._

"If you are going to make fun, give it back!" Akane cried angrily. Her hurt was now clearly ringing through her anger. Ryoga felt his fist clench in spite of himself. 

"Hey, hey don't be stupid." Ranma replied easing her hurt. _What did he see that change his mind? What was on the present? What was the gift? A ring?! No, it couldn't be...it was made by Akane...but what? Wait a scarf...I can't even focus now. _Both the Kuno siblings he noted had moved to this position as well momentarily making it hard for Ryoga to hear. _Blast them!_

"Ranma..." Akane said trailing off.

"Here I've gotten something for you too...it's not much but like you said it's Christmas. Go ahead and open it."

"Oh ok," Akane said somewhat dazed.

"It's a frame...that's the only photo I could find." Ranma said trying to almost justify his gift.

"And you picked this one..." Akane said her voice trailing off, filled with emotion, almost cracking.

"I am sorry it's not handmade or something—I am not real good at things like that either, but it's thought that counts." Ranma explained.

"Thank you Ranma this really means a lot to me." Akane said with the sincerity exuding from her voice.

" Akane..." Ranma began, with more emotion in his voice than Ryoga had ever heard before. Suddenly there was a loud crash and Ranma and Akane tumbled through the ceiling landing right before Ryoga and the other four. Ranma broke Akane's fall putting the two heirs to the Tendo Dojo in an awkward position.

"Wait a sec, it's not what it looks like..." Ranma tried to desperately explain.

Ryoga's eye flashed to the scarf that Ranma now wore. It was clearly the gift..._She made him a handmade present like that...Damn him._

"You better start talking Saotome." Ukyo demanded.

"People who play with woman's heart go very bad place." Shampoo stated coldly.

"You, you cad, what have you done to Akane?" retorted angrily, masking his jealousy.

Out of the corner of his eye, Ryoga saw Nabiki move to the light bank. She deftly switched the lights off. _Since when does she want to help Ranma like that?_

Ryoga was about to charge blindly forth when a splash of cold water hit him. _Thank you Nabiki, you just saved my secret. _Ryoga slowly but surely found his way out of the dark room, but unfortunately got lost. When he finally found his way back to the room, still trapped as a pig, only Kasumi remained in the room. Suddenly Akane entered the room from the balcony.

"Kasumi come here, come quick." Akane said eagerly.

"What is it Akane? Tell me."

"Just come on."

"Ok," Kasumi said with a slight sigh, "I am coming."

They walked out to the balcony and Ryoga hung back, just watching and listening. 

"How beautiful." Nabiki said simply. _Any compliment from Nabiki is one indeed._

"Hey that's cool." Ranma stated, awe showing on his face. Akane only laughed a short melodic laugh.

"Oh!" Kasumi said, equally in awe.

Ryoga peered to the night sky to see what had so enthralled the others. The night sky was alive with colors. Shooting stars raced to and forth and created a natural firework display that made human ones seem weak and pale in contrast.

"It's beautiful, so this must be what was in the box." Kasumi said to herself.

Ryoga turned to see the light reflected in Akane's eye. What he saw shook his world from the foundation. Ranma's hand slowly went around Akane shoulders and she nestled her head on his shoulder. The look in her eyes was one of absolute bliss...the moment that had been interrupted earlier, now continuing. He turned to Ranma his last chance of sorts, but what he saw in Akane was mirrored in Ranma's eyes.

The little pig slowly took a deep breath. Ryoga did the only thing he could do. He ran into the darkness without as much as a sound.


	3. Chapter Two The Second Breaking Point

Chapter 2 "The Second Breaking Point"

*

"Risk! Risk anything! Care no more for the opinions of others, for those voices. Do the hardest thing on earth for you. Act for yourself. Face the truth." --Katherine Mansfield

*

How long he ran, Ryoga couldn't remember. Hours passed to days, and he just kept moving. If he remained focused on traveling, the days went quickly without thought without change. At night he found no solace and the nightmares made him sleep in fitful bouts. He knew he couldn't survive like this, but he was not ready for the change either, but regardless it came. 

The change all started by a chance encounter with Cologne. _If I would have known the consequences of what would result from this encounter, I wonder if I would have fled from her that day. No, I know I would have fled..._

Ryoga had been traveling for several days deep in the mountains of Japan after that disastrous party. The events of the night weighed heavily on his soul. Late one evening he saw a campfire far off in the distance. _I might as well see who is there_, he thought. _After all, they probably could give me some directions. Not that I think they will help me, but I have to keep trying._ As Ryoga approached it and he found Cologne cooking some fish on a spit above the fire. A teapot as also glistened in the firelight. 

She regarded him closely, which made Ryoga somewhat nervous, and then simply as said as if stating a fact to a child, "I have been expecting you."

"Why are you expecting me?" Ryoga demanded. _I don't trust her,_ he told himself. _After her deception with the learning of the_ _Bakusai-ten-ketsu, I don't have any reason to trust her._

"With three thousand years of Chinese Amazon Tradition, I've learned to sense many important events before they occur. Tonight will be one of them. Actually I wanted to ask you a few questions. " she replied. A smug grin crossed her face as she continued.

"What is your primary goal, Ryoga?"

"What do you mean, primary goal?" he demanded. Cologne moved with incredible speed, striking Ryoga on the head with her stave. 

"If you are going to ask questions, show respect. What do you want more than anything else in the world?"

__

Oh, that's easy, Ryoga thought, rubbing his throbbing temple. _She didn't have to hit me so hard._ "I want to defeat Ranma," he replied automatically.

"Why?"

"Because of how he treats Akane. She deserves better than the likes of him." Ryoga explained with a hint of frustration leaking into his voice. _And for what he did to me. Why is she asking such stupid questions?_

"So could you rephrase your goal as getting Ranma to treat Akane better—or even Akane being treated well?" Cologne replied smugly.

"Umm..I guess that's right. Ryoga stammered.

"Well then, Ryoga, how is defeating Ranma going to change how Akane is treated?" Cologne inquired with a hint of scorn in her tone.

"What do you mean?" Ryoga replied angrily. _What was she getting at? _Ryoga barely managed to get out of the way before her stave came down again. "Sorry." He muttered. _I shouldn't stay here and listen to this garbage._

"Good he can be still be taught." She grinned wolfishly at him. "What I am saying is your methods won't accomplish your goal. Improving Akane's treatment and defeating Ranma have nothing to do with one another. After all when you had that tattoo of the battling god, you easily defeated Ranma numerous times. You could have defeated him when he was weakened before learning the Hiryuu Shoten Ha as well.Did defeating him change anything at all?"

"Well,...umm...no, but that's not the point." Ryoga conceded. 

"My point is that you aren't focused on the right goal. That's why you aren't making any progress towards it. Do you remember when I was teaching you the Bakusai-ten-ketsu?" Cologne explained.

"I remember it very well." Ryoga snapped. _How could I forget that failure? Even with your help I couldn't beat Ranma that day. Worst of all, it was in front of Aka..._

"Well, do you remember what you drilled into that boulder. Those simple characters that spelled..."

"Akane..."

"Exactly. So what is you primary goal now?" Cologne prompted.

Ryoga hesitated for a moment. _That happened one other time as well. I pushed the characters into the floorboard in that cabin without thinking that night I found that little white pig. As much as I hate to admit it, she's right. My goal has be Akane all along—at least subconsciously. It hasn't anything to do with Ranma. Except he's the opposition._

"Why are you telling me this? Why are you trying to help me?" he blurted out in anger. _Of course. She wants me to separate Akane and Ranma. In a way our goals are the same, just different sides of the same coin. If Akane and I...then, Shampoo and Ranma.. That's why she's helping me. That's the only reason she cares at all about me. I am just a pawn furthering her goals..._

"Well what is your primary goal, Ryoga?"

"You don't answer my questions, so why should I answer yours?" Ryoga shouted in vexation. 

Cologne smiled grimly. "Your questions don't matter to me. Mine do matter to you."

Ryoga stared forward for a brief moment, his eyes trying to fix on a point in the darkness. His anger had subsided into something much colder. _Why do I feel so bad about myself? I don't know what my goal is...I have been so consumed by trying to defeat Ranma, I don't have much else. And she's right I did defeat him. And it doesn't matter. It never mattered. All my hardships have been in vain....I do know what my goal is. I just haven't been able to admit it to her to Aka...the only person that matters... _

The tears swelling up in his eyes, Ryoga did the only thing he could. He ran into the darkness.

*

*

__

Ryoga, you fool, Cologne silently thought. _Did you really think I would ask you questions without knowing the answers myself already?_

Quickly dousing the flames with a bucket of water, Cologne started to pursue Ryoga. _I need to make sure he comes to the right conclusions. He's not a bad boy, _she mused_, especially because his wishes mirror my own. Having Akane separated from my future-son-in-law by her own will, would be better than using force. It would be much harder for my future-son-in-law, to struggle against that. But I will do that if it comes to that. I just can't afford to wait for him to waste anymore time waiting on Ryoga. After all the more he delays the harder it will be separating my future-son-in-law if he fails. That's why I had to give him a little push in the right direction. Hopefully, _she wondered, _I didn't push him too far. Tampering with the human heart was always a risky business. One could never really know how far a slight tap might take one. I would never have thought Shampoo would have truly fallen in love with Ranma, but it seems to be so now. Ryoga was just as delicate around Akane, perhaps more so._

He almost seemed to be shaking inside. Fists of stone and a heart of glass, indeed. If he dealt with his mental anguish half as well as he did with physical discomfort he would be fine. Perhaps this weakness is even greater than his Jusenkyo curse. 

Idly, she remembered training Ryoga to defeat her future-son-in-law._ So much has happen since I have arrived in Japan_, she thought as sighed briefly. _But the testing is finally done so now the game truly begins._ Cologne smiled as she remembered the events of the past months with particular clarity.

__

Her future-son-in-law had met or exceeded every challenge placed before him. Not that she would have accepted any less. The tribal law shown to outsiders was more a formality than actual law. 

She let her mind drift a bit as she followed. _Ryoga is getting ahead, but not far enough to be able to evade me. I'll catch him soon enough._ Over her long lifetime Cologne had learned to attack her own plans from every angle. Rarely was she foiled when it wasn't part of her plan to be so. _The only clue that might reveal my plans was teaching Ranma my ancient techniques like Kachuu Tenshin Amaguriken and the Hiryuu Shoten Ha. Why would I teach my secrets to an outsider if I weren't sure he would become part of the tribe? Of course none of them have realized that yet and by the time they do, if they do, well then it will be too late. _Cologne grinned as she started the chase on Ryoga. 

Suddenly she sensed something—something evil. Something incredibly vile. It was within a close proximity. There could only be one thing so evil in all Japan.

With a start Cologne braced herself and silently mouthed the word "Happi"

*

*

Happousai quickly made his way through the mountain trail. _Ranma has pushed me too far this time. Ungrateful ingrate. All I wanted was a little student to Master bonding time, but he just doesn't understand me. Neither did Akane. None of them understand. After all the time I spent training Soun and Genma. And what do I get in return? Ingrates..._

Happousai felt a wave of angry come over him. _All they do is plot against me. Well, I have had it. I have gone too soft on them. They are really going to pay now. I won't forgive them easily this time. The worms will be pleading before I am done with them._

He stopped as he came to the opening of the cave that he had been sealed in so long ago. _I spent so long in this dark old cave thanks to Soun and Genma. Maybe I should lock them down here before I am done. Or Ranma. Yes, he thought Ranma. For all his claims otherwise, a little separated from Akane would hurt him more than anything else I could do. And Soun and Genma would be hurt as well. They'll carry on the school, but ten years should be fitting justice. _

It was equally fitting, he thought, _the method of my revenge will come from the same place they sealed me in. When they sealed me in, they didn't know I had a second scroll of my legendary technique the Happodaikarin. With the real Happodaikarin, I will truly be unstoppable. And then the mice will meet a real cat...._

Happousai smiled fully appreciating how his analogy fit Ranma's own weakness. And in that instant he was knocked from his feet.

*

*

"Watch were you are going, boy? Or I'll have to teach you how to respect your elders?" the wrinkled and stunted old man threatened.

Ryoga said slowly, "You look familiar. Hey, you're Ranma's perverted master aren't you?" As an after thought he added "And you ran into me." _What is he doing out here?_

"Ranma is no student of mine, I am going teach him a lesson soon enough. You're that Ryoga boy aren't you. And you are calling me perverted?!" Happousai chuckled as he leapt to his feet.

"What is that supposed to mean, you..." Ryoga struggled for an instant for an insult. "You old freak." _I guess using Ranma's is better than nothing. If he's suggesting what I think he is, I'll kill him._

The look on Happousai 's face hardened quite a bit. He changed his tone to the one he used to lecture small children. 

"Oh, just about everyone knows about Akane's little piggy." Happousai began. At the word piggy Ryoga felt himself bristle.

"Frankly I couldn't be prouder if I had thought of that idea myself, boy. I wasn't insulting you, just saying we are kindred spirits. Actually I could train you to defeat Ranma. Even that Kuno boy almost defeated him with the help of my lightening potion...you could surely..." Happousai observed.

"Damn you! You take that back, or I'll..." Ryoga challenged. _Or I'll what? Let you beat me up. _

"Look, I am only stating the truth. Now are you interested in training or not?"

"I am not a pervert. Ranma's the pervert. And I wouldn't train under you. You make me sick. Take what you said back!" Ryoga shouted angrily. 

"Be reasonable boy. There is nothing wrong with having interests like we do. Trust me, I've lived my whole life like this. " He paused to reflect for a moment then continued, "I can recognize a brilliant scheme when I see one. What you did to Akane is so insidious...I love it. Now as I was sayi..." as he spoke he grinned suggestively.

"I am not like you! That's it. Prepare to die, you dirty old man." Ryoga yelled impulsively as he charged Happousia. _I can't believe what this pervert is accusing me of. It makes me so mad..._

Happousia easily dodged out of the way of Ryoga's headlong assault. As he passed by, Happousai tapped Ryoga with his pipe and Ryoga was thrown forward into a boulder. 

"I guess I am going to have to teach you a lesson of respect for your elders." For an instant that seemed like an eternity, Ryoga struggled to his feet and renewed his charge screaming unintelligently. Happousia easily avoided his blows and then hit him with a slight tap that spent Ryoga spiraling upward. He hit the ground with a loud thud. Before Ryoga could as much as stand, Happousia tossed a small brown fire cracker at Ryoga and it exploded on impact.

"This isn't over, not by a long shot." Ryoga said in a grim voice as he worked his way back to his feet. _I won't let him defeat me. If I did, I could never face Ak...I won't allow it. If she heard about this my life would lose all meaning. She would hate me more than even him. _Depression surged throughout Ryoga and he only felt worse. _My life just keeps getting lousier and lousier. Even when I think it can't get any worse it does. First, I thought the day Ranma tarnished my honor fleeing our battle. Then I thought the day Ranma pushed me into that spring it was the worst it could be that it was hell itself being trapped in the body of a pig. But now I know Akane hating would be infinitely worse. _And then Ryoga's depression manifested itself. 

"Shishi houkou-dan". Ryoga ki attack surged forth blasting Happousia. The blazing ball of ki streaked forward unerringly. The old man was knocked from his feet for an instant more surprised than hurt, but sprung up almost immediately. 

"So you want to play rough do you? Well, remember I am a master, while you are nothing more than a dabbler in the Art." Happousai 's battle aura surged forth. The red spirit outline formed an aura of utter rage. Ryoga was awestruck.

_I can't do anything. Why aren't my limbs responding. I am just so afraid_. _The power..._

The old man slowly walked up to Ryoga and tapped him in the stomach with his pipe. Ryoga was flung forward helplessly into the cave. He crashed into a boulder several dozen feet deep in the cave. Ryoga strained his body and worked his way to his feet.

"Well, boy, I am impressed that you managed to even get up after that last attack. But you are in no condition to fight a new born kitten, so you have no chance of defeating me." Happousai gloated. 

The old man moved forward with blinding speed. With another tap of his pipe, Ryoga was thrown to the entrance of the cave again. The crunch of bone against stone echoed loudly. Dusting himself off, Happousai put his pipe away. 

"Well, that was easy enough. I guess that proves I still got it." He chuckled. "Now to find that scroll," he murmured to himself as he started to survey the cave.

"Bakusai-ten-ketsu." Ryoga growled in fury as he sought every breaking point he could reach. "I told you it wasn't over by a long shot." He whispered. Any response by Happousai was drowned out by the crash of falling rocks.

He staggered to his feet, but then collapsed under his own weight. Darkness bled into his senses until he could we engulfed by it. 

*

*

Ryoga awoke with a start. _Everything hurts. What on earth happened?_ He stiffly managed to rise to his feet.

_Where is Happousai? It must have been a dream. I couldn't have actually kil..._

Ryoga quickly scanned the area and there was the cave—complete with the entrance blocked with rocks. Cologne stood in front of it inscribing some fashion of runes on the rocks before Ryoga.

"Did I kil—it was an accident. I just lost my temper after what he said..." Ryoga stuttered.

"No, it would take a lot more than a few falling rocks to kill him. He was sealed in this spot once before by Genma and Soun. They did a very poor job and he managed to break free eventually. My wards, once they are finished will hold him he for some time." Cologne answered.

"But by the same merit, Ryoga, what if you had killed him? You should learn to control your temper. It is more than likely you might someday do something you'll regret." Cologne lectured as she worked, turning her back on him to complete the ward.

"I don't know what I would do if I had..." Ryoga mused. _What if that had been Ranma? Or if Akane or some innocent person had gotten the way of one of our fights. As much as I talk about fighting Ranma, I don't know what I would do without..._

As Cologne worked, Ryoga Hibiki slipped into the darkness, his body injured, his soul in turmoil.

*

*

How long Ryoga ran, he never knew. He just ran and ran. He was bleeding in half a dozen places, but he couldn't make himself care. At last the physical and emotional distress overwhelmed him and he collapsed. Finally he crept into an uneasy sleep.

Sleep of course was worse than being awake. He could block out events by focusing on his physical injuries--by embracing his pain, but while he slept the nightmares struck without mercy. Ryoga could see all too well the events of the Christmas party and his encounters in the mountains as they were woven in nightmare after nightmare.

When he finally awoke, the brilliant sun was shinning down upon him. He just remained sprawled on his back eyes closed and mind raced considering the events of his recent history. Pushing the thoughts of the past out of his mind he started to walk. If he was moving he could avoid thinking. _One foot, then the other, in endless repetition. _

As he walked forests faded to concrete sidewalks, but Ryoga simply wasn't awake on that level. Everything he saw and thought was still in a haze. People looked at his ghastly state, but no one said anything to him. He focused on putting on foot in front of the other, cut off from the outside world. Suddenly his reverie was shattered.

"Hello there, are you ok? Honestly, you look dreadful..."

Ryoga looked at the man that had addressed him. He was a young man in his mid twenties. Brown hair and eyes and a gaunt frame. The only feature that was distinguished him from others was a pair of glasses, that almost shined like tin foil in the sunlight.

"I am ok..." Ryoga muttered weakly.

"Would you object if I cleaned up some of those wounds. I am a doctor...I'd hate to see any get infected."

"I guess that's ok."

The doctor led him into a small clinic, and sat Ryoga down on an examining table. He leaned over another shelf and pulled out some bandages and ointments.

As he started to apply the bandages and ointments, he asked "So how did you get so beat up in the first place?"

"I got into a small fight. I lost my temper and didn't hold anything back, it was me or him." 

"What were you fighting over?" the young doctor inquired.

"The guy said something that I couldn't stand to hear said." Ryoga muttered. _Why am I revealing this to this doctor? I guess he's helping me, but I shouldn't feel so at ease with a stranger...maybe my injuries have affected my mind...there's something about him, I can't place...competence_

"Was it true?" the doctor asked.

Ryoga bit his tongue. _It was true, but not like how that old freak suggested it._

"I see." The doctor said after a moment of silence.

"I don't know how explain the fight.. he said something about a friend...," Ryoga stammered, "There's a girl I like a whole lot, but whenever I try to talk to her, well something in me snaps. I just trip over my words and I can't admit to her how I feel."

The doctor looked away for a moment and gazed longingly at the window. "I think I understand how you feel. We are more of kindred spirits than you know."

"I just can't control myself when I lose my temper." Ryoga sighed.

"What if that girl you like would have been there? She could have gotten hurt, by the looks of your wounds."

Ryoga stood stunned for a moment and then built up his resolve. _I must control my temper. It's just so easy to give into it and lose myself in that rage. I remember when Ranma was learning the Hiryuu Shoten Ha. I was the catalyst, he needed my anger. But it hurts me now. I need that soul of ice. I need control not rage now. I can't let myself hurt Akane or some other innocent due to my anger. If she would have been at that cave, she could have been killed. I must control my angry. Not now, not ever will I succumb to it again! It's holding me back. No wonder I never can reach my goals with such a distraction._

"You're right." Ryoga said simply, hating to admit it.

"You can't make a resolution in one day. You need to believe it and focus on it. Where are your parents?"

"My entire family has a poor sense of direction," he started, _That's an understatement, _"we all get lost...I've not seen them much at all. I never have. It's ok, I've sorta got used to it." He continued.

"Everyone needs friends and family. You seem to have a lot burdening you. Do you attend school?"

"It's not possible with my sense of direction. I couldn't go even if I wanted too...I tried once, but I realized it would never work." Ryoga explained. _I couldn't even do it for her, _he thought remembering his oath not to fight while studying for that placement test_._

"I see. Would you consider being an informal apprentice?" The doctor asked. "I know it seems sudden, but until your wounds heal you really shouldn't be by yourself regardless." 

"I don't know...I wouldn't want to impose." Ryoga said. _I've got to get out of here. I don't know why but it just feels wrong. There's no way someone should be helping a total stranger so much. _He took a step backward towards the door and stopped. _I always run when I can't handle something. Like the Christmas party, like from what Cologne said, like from what I did to that old freak. Could I be running still? _

"Besides, I'd love to have the company."

"I am kinda a loner." Ryoga added weakly. _It probably wouldn't hurt to stay until I can shrug off these injuries...no more running...time to face life like a man rather than child._

"You'd really be no trouble at all. We could work on your education alittle while you're body recovers, and perhaps work on you're skills later."

"I guess I could stay for awhile, again if it wouldn't be too much trouble."

" Let me get something."

The doctor went to the study and returned after a few minutes. In his hands, he had a worn pair of leather shoulder pads. He slowly put them on Ryoga.

"You've been carrying a very heavy emotional burden, I think, let's match it with a physical one." The doctor said quietly.

"Thank you I think..."Ryoga said awkwardly

"Great, we'll start immediately." The doctor said, taking a step towards his library.

"Oh, my name is Ryoga Hibiki, sorry it slipped my mind earlier..."

"I am Doctor Tofu."

*

*

The first thing Ryoga found different about his life were his sleeping habits. The nights became short and terrible. He couldn't bear to sleep. Insomniac barely described him accurately. His subconscious tormented him with events of the past, over and over again in endless repetition. Ryoga saw lost opportunities dangled in front of him again and again only to be jerked out of his grasp at the last moment. It was as if his depression were a vampire. Alive when night fell, but terribly afraid of the light of day. On a good night he'd get four hours of uneasy sleep, the rest spent reading.

His days were divided into two major parts. The first part was his informal education. When Doctor Tofu wasn't receiving a patient, he would select a wide variety of novels and books of all sorts for Ryoga to read and then they would discuss them at great length. These books ranged histories of Japan, China, and the West, to European novels like "Hamlet" and "Faust", and everything in between. Ryoga struggled at first with this literature, but he quickly found he had a talent in understanding the darker emotions. The bleaker a book was the better he would understand it. Interestingly enough, Ryoga quickly noticed that Doctor Tofu would stress the points of honor, morals, and duty more than anything else. Ryoga. They deftly avoided the topics of their first conversation and Ryoga's past and for that Ryoga was thankful. Doctor Tofu would also challenge Ryoga at a number of games like chess that were very strategic. At first he lost quite a bit, but as time based Ryoga began to learn how to evaluate the situations better and slowly became better at the various games.

The second part of his education was largely secondary knowledge. Doctor Tofu was a chiropractor, and Ryoga often watched him help patients. Over time, he slowly began to pick up a rudimentary knowledge of what the doctor was doing and why he chose to do what he chose. Ryoga found himself asking questions that were very specifically targeted to the Doctor. He usually knew the answers before he even invented the questions, at least after awhile. _It was almost like a battle, you have to predict what your opponent is going to do next and react with a combination of training and instinct. _

Ryoga measured his days in how his wounds improved. At first there seemed little progress. However slowly, he recovered his strength as winter faded to spring.

*

*

One night after hiding from his nightmares for so long, Ryoga decided it was time for him to face them. He need to considered the direction of his life, which meant thinking about the party, the battle, and what Cologne had said.

__

As much as I hate it Cologne is right. I've had a mental block. My truest goal has been and will always be Akane's welfare. Even when she lost her inheritance, I helped to train her to get it back, despite the fact that it would only unite her and Ranma. I just couldn't stand to see her suffer. Even when my mind said leave and I ran away that night, my subconscious brought me back—I am a slave to it.

I really don't like Ranma not for what he's done to me, but what he's done to Akane. For the fact he's so mean to her. My primary goal is her. And he makes her upset! She was so disappointed when he wouldn't eat her food the day of the party...and at the Christmas party...she was so happy when they saw those falling stars, her head on his shoulder under that brilliant light. But seeing her that way hurt me. I've never been able to make her light up like that...a smile that could raise the dead... 

I've been a dunce before. I've looked at their words and not their actions. His mind briefly touched a thousand different little events, as small as a glance and as large as risking their life for the other's benefit.

I've been so blind, so very blind. They do love one another. I don't love her though, not in the same way. She rescued me when I was alone in the world. Akane brought meaning to my life. But she doesn't love me. And I don't love her, like that, I only want to reflect that warmth she gave to me, back to her. I want her to be at her highest state...I want her to be happy above all else...and as much as I want to be the one to help her reach that status, I never shall be able to. I want her to be happy so desperately, that is my primary goal, my reason for existence, always has been to since I truly met her. And she loves Ranma for better or worse, there's nothing I can do or say to change that. Even if I defeated him or even killed him, it wouldn't change a thing...the latter only making Akane hate me. She loves him unconditionally... 

That's why both Akane and Ranma get jealous over such stupid things. They can't admit it, but they do! If they really hated each other, they wouldn't care. It's so obvious now, why couldn't I see it before? Akane wouldn't care about Shampoo or Ukyo and Ranma wouldn't get jealous of my secret...

Ryoga mused darkly, _She is bound to find out eventually about my curse. It's just a matter of time. It could be days, it could be weeks, it could be years, but just the same she will find out. And then she'll hate me as bitterly as she can fathom hate. If she finds out Ranma knew, she'll hate him too, and that will hurt her because she loves him so much. I need to protect that secret._

Oh, who am I fooling now. Myself? I can't bear to tell her not because I fear for Ranma but because I fear for myself. No more delusions, no more illusions. I need to face my fears. I think I could keep it hidden though, I've managed this long, after so many close calls...

Oh, Akane...no, even if she would never find out; I have to tell her. I talk about honor, but I live a lie. She'll hate me for sure, but I have to tell her. It's my only hope for redemption, to purge my sense of honor..

I have only one course of action.

Ryoga quickly jotted down a simple note, explaining to his mentor that he had some unfinished business to attend too...and that it was unlikely he'd ever return. He thanked his benefactor for his time and he hoped to make him proud.

Ryoga had finally reached out with his mind's eye and sought the breaking point. Not the breaking point of stone but one much more difficult to fathom, one of the mind. Unlike stone that after shattering only created a cloud of dust that obscured reality, the one of the mind once shattered created only clarity to reality.


	4. Chapter Three The Truth

Chapter 3 "The Truth"

*

"I love you, and because I love you, I would sooner have you hate me for telling you the truth than adore me for telling you lies." -- Pietro Aretino 

__

*

Nabiki surveyed the situation with detached interest. Ryoga meant a chance to earn money. Usually Ranma and Ryoga would fight very close battles, with Ranma coming out just a whisker ahead, though consistently so, making betting on Ranma a gold mine. _It's really a shame there's no one her to bet with; it is really too bad this little battle didn't take place at school...it would have been a good chance to make a little money... _

As she observed the meeting, her opinion changed. _That's very strange. They aren't fighting. Why is Ranma leaving now? _Nabiki continued to try to analyze the situation without much luck. _This is most curious. Something is up, Ryoga is certainly out of his norm. He should have attacked Ranma, turned into a pig, or run crying into the distance by now. He's always done one of the three in the past. Why the change now, and more importantly, how can I use this to my advantage? _

Nabiki watched Ranma lead Akane to where Ryoga was. Then slowly the trio moved out of sight. Deftly, Nabiki flipped on her headphones and tried several bugs until she found one near where they were. _Information and preplanning win the day again_, she thought and couldn't suppress a faint smirk.

"What are you listening to Nabiki?" her father Soun asked, looking up from his game.

"Oh, nothing, just a new CD, I hope it's very interesting." Nabiki said, her face going as cold as stone. _It should be very interesting indeed._

*

*

In only a few moments all those memories that had brought him to the Tendo doorstep passed before Ryoga's weary eyes. A lifetime in an instant had gone by for him. Ranma had returned, Akane following him. As they returned Ryoga saw Akane say something and Ranma only shrugged in response. Then she said something quickly and shot a glare at him. Ranma only shrugged again in response. The trio moved to a spot well out of eyesight of the house. Ryoga then focused on seeing Ranma first and then to Akane. He had known them almost two years but for the first time he truly saw them. _So much time wasted, but it is not in vain, not if I can fix things._

Ranma stood before him with his raven black hair, short save for his pigtail. Ryoga's dead eyes were met Ranma's blue eyes, like a swamp and an ocean colliding. He wore his ageless red Chinese shirt and black slacks. This almost unassuming young man was the person Ryoga had spent so much of his life trying to defeat. Ironically Ryoga noted he was in Ranma's shadow as he approached. Ryoga had hated or told himself that he hated Ranma so many times. For his egotism, for his ability, for the fact he had and insulted everything Ryoga needed to be happy... 

Akane followed right behind Ranma. Her short dark hair framed her pretty face like a halo. Her brown eyes showed sympathy in them..._probably for me_ Ryoga realized_. She really is my guardian angel...but doesn't know I am alive. That doesn't matter though, all that matters is the answer they will give me...a final one._

Ryoga took a deep breath and turned to Ranma not wasting time for pleasantries like greetings, "I have something very important...to tell you both. Ranma, right before you started learning the Hiryuu Shoten Ha, I helped protect you from those that would try to kill you in your weakened condition. I've never asked for any repayment for my help, until now. I feel you owe me a favor."

Ryoga watched Ranma closely. At first he displayed sincere interest, but at the mention of a favor, Ranma's entire demeanor changed to a very uneasy one. Ryoga risked a glance at Akane and she too seemed nervous—much more so than before he had spoken. _It's as if the two of them are having a conversation...one without words...maybe on a higher level. Their emotions seem to mirror each other. But why? Why are they both so..._

"What exactly do you mean?" Ranma replied with frustration seeping into his voice.

Ryoga paused for a moment considering their actions and words closely. _His words seem like a cornered dog growling._ _Of course?! He thinks I am going to ask for him to step down about Aka... _

"All I want from you is very simple." Ryoga continued, watching Ranma tense with every word, confirming his suspicions. "I want you to listen to what I have to say. Just hear me out and not leave until I am through. Got it? Simple enough for you?"

"I can handle that, I guess." Ranma replied his fears being reduced, but not outright eliminated.

"Akane..." he said his voice nearly faltering. Ryoga closed his eyes tightly and managed to say, "I ask the same of you. Just hear me out for better or worse. Whatever I tell you, promise me you won't leave this spot until I am finished."

"You have my word, Ryoga." Akane said, with a trace of concern and quite a bit of confusion in her voice.

"Ok, Ranma, what is your true goal?" Ryoga said more harshly than he intended his eyes coming wide open to face the pig-tailed boy. _No thinking just focus, it's a battle...I need to control this._

"What on earth do you mean?" Ranma replied, with raising his hands in the air in frustration.

"What do you want more than anything else in life?" Ryoga asked.

"I don't know..."

"Is it to carry on your school of martial arts? To simply practice the art? To be rid of your curse," Ryoga demanded, and with a faint grin on his face that he couldn't suppress, he added, "Or is it something else." _The real answer; the only answer._

"What are you talking about?" Ranma said exasperated. 

"Well, let's go through them, one by one shall we? If your goal is only to carry on the school, then why not marry Akane and be done with it?" Ryoga asked, with a slight bit of conceit on his face, still showing from before.

__

"What?!" both Ranma and Akane nearly yelled at once. Ryoga noted that after the initial shock both Ranma and Akane had blushed profusely after his question. _It is too ironic the best answers come in silence._

"Ryoga you are making less sense than usual. That's pops idea, not mine. Who would want to marry an un..." Ranma started, but stopped dead in his tracks after glancing at Akane, hyper space mallet summoned in her hand.

"Ranma you dummy! I wouldn't want to marry a pervert anyway." Akane exclaimed. She turned to Ryoga, "Why am I here at all?" Akane asked with frustration filling her voice, though she managed to restrain herself from actually using her mallet.

"Then Ranma, you'd agree, your primary goal is not to carry on the school."

"Yes, you blockhead."

"Then the art perhaps?" 

"I've studied the art my entire life...."

"But is that what matters most to you? If it is why not go out and find the martial artist that gave me the Mark of the Gods? Then you'd be invincible." Ryoga said smugly. _It is also ironic I have you right where I want you, after the war's over...my life is one sad joke to the world_, he darkly mused.

__

"Well that's not me just the mark..."

"Then it's not you're truest goal then correct? After all your school is anything goes..." Ryoga said almost mocking Ranma. _I take no joy in doing this Ranma, I wish I could explain that to you. But it must be done in this manner, or you'd both think I was crazy. Well even crazier than you do now. _

"What if he wouldn't give me the mark..." Ranma began...

"Have you even tried, Ranma..." not waiting for an answer Ryoga continued waving a his hand in a gesture of dismissal, "No, I think not. Thus it is not your primary goal either."

"Ryoga, what is the point of this?" Akane asked angrily.

__

"All I ask is for you two to hear me through. After that I won't bother you anymore." Ryoga replied curtly. _Maybe the war's not over yet, in fact I am sure of it. It only gets more bloodily from here. _He silently prayed, _Forgive me.. _

Ryoga took a deep breath and said at length, "Then where were we...ah, yes you're curse."

The lost boy reached into his backpack and pulled out a simple canteen. He uncorked it and displayed to his friends. _I guess I hope they are my friends at least...not after today though. Funny how for by the time I learn I have friends, I am about to lose them. But if I set things right, I am willing to sacrifice everything._

"This is Nanniichuan water." Ryoga said simply, lying through his teeth. He watched a sense of wonder enter Ranma's eyes. Ryoga sadly noted the light in Ranma's eyes was reflected in Akane's as well. _She's just told me more than all her protests ever could...another answer in silence._

"Is that for me..." Ranma began his voice barely above a whisper.

"Sure, I'll let you have it...but only if you'll let me hit Akane with it too." Ryoga stated with cold rage. He then twisted the canteen to spray the water at his sitting friends. As fast as Ryoga could try to hit the unsuspecting couple with the water, Ranma was faster, moving himself and Akane unceremoniously well out of the range of Ryoga's stream of water and into the dirt.

"What did you do that for?!!" Ranma demanded.

"Have you gone insane?" Akane shouted.

"I am more sane than I've ever been before. That water was absolutely normal water. Sorry for the deception, but I needed to be sure." _Just like when he destroyed the spring on Togenkyo Island. Actions do speak louder than words. All your protests were nothing more than a mask. And now, my rival, you are unmasked. _

"What are you doing, Ryoga? Sure of what?" Ranma nearly shouted, at his wit's end.

"Thank you Ranma," Ryoga said simply. He muttered almost to himself, "I know your primary goal now...in fact the only goal that matters to you at all, most likely."

"Oh, I give up..." Ranma said, moving to leave.

"Ranma, you're word." Ryoga stated coldly, "after today I won't be welcome here anymore anyway. I doubt you'll ever see me again, but let me say my peace."

A dangerous flash of insight blazed brightly in Ranma's eyes and in an instant he was within a few inches of Ryoga, his hands planted firmly on Ryoga's shoulders, shaking the lost boy. "You aren't are you? Not to her about it..." he stuttered.

"Yes, in good time, but there's something I need to tell you both first." Ryoga said, trying as much as he could to detach all emotion from his voice. He stepped aside of Ranma's grasp and announced, "Happousai won't bother you for quite awhile, maybe never again."

"Did something happen to Grandfather Happousai? He has been gone for quite some time..." Akane asked, a slight bit of concern showing on her face even for him.

"What happened to the old freak?" Ranma said insolently. 

"I was wandering in the mountains and ran into Cologne...." Ryoga started.

"What was the old ghoul doing there?" Ranma interrupted.

"I don't know honestly, but she and I had a talk, and I fled from what she said. I ran into Happousai, near the cave where you're fathers sealed him in...I don't know why he was there. We fought..." Ryoga said, a strange bleakness showing in his eyes.

"And?" Ranma questioned.

"He thoroughly beat me at every turn. Not even my Ki blasts could truly hurt him..." Ryoga stuttered, turning away from Ranma and Akane. His eyes stared out at the horizon, not fixing on any one point. 

"I don't understand..." Akane began.

"He knocked me down and didn't think I'd manage to recover...I almost didn't. But I so how found a reserve of strength and I sought every breaking point I could. I started a cave in. He's trapped in there now."

"Alright!" Ranma exclaimed.

"Poor Happousai..." Akane muttered.

"But it will take more than that to kill him or keep him down. The old freak is nearly invincible." Ranma said, reconsidering the events.

"Cologne used some sort of wards to keep him in place. Like you're father's used but much better because she isn't incompetent." Ryoga explained his voice completely empty of emotion.

"Yeah, pop, is pretty stupid at times...The old ghoul could do that I bet..." Ranma started, then he added, "So you really think Happousai is trapped now?" 

"If Cologne is right. I just thought you should know that."

"That's the best news I've heard in ages." Ranma said smiling, his voice ringing with confidence. "No more freak causing trouble for me."

"All you can think of is yourself, Ranma...honestly can't you even imagine what it's like in there again for him?" Akane complained.

"That shows what you know, you uncute tomboy."

"You pervert."

Ranma started to continue the fight, but Ryoga spoke too quickly and interrupted him.

"He had it coming. Regardless, I have just one more thing to say before I leave for good." Ryoga stated, mustering as much courage as he could. There was a slight pause as he felt himself hesitate. _This is it Ryoga, are you a man or a pig? This is the hardest battle of the longest war of my life. The turning or the breaking point. This is the point of no return, where I purge my honor or lose it. This is it..._

"Ryoga, please go on?" Akane said, noticing his pause.

"Akane...I need to beg for your forgiveness...though I am unworthy to even dream of it." Ryoga pleaded, doing everything in his power to choke the tears about to form in his eyes.

"I don't understand..." she started, her voice lined with sympathy and confusion.

"Ryoga, I won't let you tell her..." Ranma shouted angrily, the faint glow of a red battle aura surrounding him. He made a step forward and moved to strike Ryoga. To Ranma's surprise, Ryoga's body fell limp, making no move to defend himself, and he collapsed to his knees before Akane. At the last moment, Ranma used his incredible speed to withdraw the threatened strike.

"Akane...I have a curse...like Ranma...I am...Pchan." Ryoga stuttered, mustering ever bit of courage he had ever possessed. Ryoga felt like everything he had ever eaten was trying to crawl its way out of his stomach step by gut wrenching step. 

"Oh, Ryoga...how could you...why did you..." Akane said, her voice so soft it was almost inaudible. Tears had begun to form unheralded in her eyes.

He started talking as quickly as he could so she wouldn't have a chance to interrupt him, "I know...you'll never forgive me...but I had to tell you...I've been so afraid...so long...I know you hate me...I betrayed your trust...I'd do anything to make it up to you...but I know I can't...I am so sorry...farewell." 

Ryoga made no move to leave. _If she physically hit me, that would be the easy way out. He remembered how his fight with Ranma had inadvertently sliced her hair, so long ago. To be let off that easy would be a crime. I'll stay and take something much worse from her. Her words. They'll haunt me until the day I drop dead, but I need to hear them. Perhaps they'll even torment me longer than life itself. I'll never cleanse myself of the taint of my actions, of the betrayal of her trust, but if I am to have any form of redemption I must purge myself in the one way that I can._

Akane's eyes got very distant despite the tears rushing out of them and she quietly and unexpectedly muttered, "Ranma knew didn't he? That's why he tried to stop you from telling me."

Ranma muttered incoherently, not even attempting to say anything to explain. _Of all the things...why did she say that? Hit me, Akane! Why did she ask that question!? It doesn't make sense...unless my understanding is flawed._

"But he didn't stop you...so Ranma can't lo..." she said, her voice quavering so much she was unable to go on as she buried her face in her hands.

At one time in his life, Ryoga wouldn't have seen the significance of what she had just uttered because he would have been consumed by rage at seeing her in tears. Now he saw the significance with surprising clarity. "_Can't love me". It's all so obvious now. She is insecure about Ranma. _Ryoga thought back to the day of the Christmas party when Ranma had refused to eat Akane's cooking. Her words haunted him, she only wanted to make him happy. _She's too shy...too insecure to express her affection in words..._ He thought back to just a few moments ago when he had mentioned the lie of the Nanniichuan water and the look in her eyes. Ryoga remembered what had caused him to flee the Christmas party, the smile that could bring back the dead--brought into existence by Ranma, his rival. And he knew what it meant, he knew her one true goal at least...or maybe he only saw it unfettered by his own perspective for the first time

__

Their words at the party... _the ones I eavesdropped on. They were so close to the truth...but we stopped them. Damn you Shampoo, Damn you Ukyo, Damn the entire house of Kuno. Damn my black soul the most of all!_ _We call ourselves in love, but it's all greed. True love ennobles not debases, and oh how we have debased... The truth is a bitter pill...but it is not too late. Not unless I let it. _Ryoga mustered the shattered remains of his courage with this new resolve.

"First, I made Ranma promise not to reveal my curse. He had some part in the folly that lead to it and as much as we fight, Ranma keeps his word." Ryoga said trying to recreate the portrait of Ranma that Akane had. He remembered her words, so clearly now, like a dream real and unreal_, "Oh, it's Ranma's fault. It's always his fault." Not this time, I'll set this right. _Catching himself, he wandered _Folly? Where did I come up with that word from! I've been reading too many books._

"Then he could..." Akane whispered before catching herself.

"It all is so simple now...I understand." Ryoga said more calmly than he looked. Both a musing Akane and confused Ranma saw him anew for the first time.

Ryoga started talking slowly and almost whispering, but as he spoke he sped up and his voice growing louder with every word. "For so long, I've believed the subterfuge. It's all smoke and mirrors, more an illusion than anything else. No, it is not an illusion but a mode of operation. When either of you insults the other, you get attention from the other one for doing so...and that attention in turn engenders more insults and more attention...a cycle but why would you want the other's attention? Truly a riddle for the ages isn't it?." _Engenders? Where did that come fro...No, just focus on the words, Ryoga._

"It's not like that..." Ranma started, though his voice lacked the sincerity of true protest.

"Isn't it? It has let Ukyo and Shampoo both kindle a hopeless spark and at the same time her jealousy shows to you how much Akane loves you." Akane blushed profusely at this, but Ryoga continued undaunted, unwavering for once in his life. "Why else would you let it continue? If she truly didn't care, then why would she become jealous at all? Or why would you become jealous of...my weakness." Ryoga stated in almost ordinary tones, which made his entire disparage all the more unnerving. 

Ryoga waited an instant for a conditioned reflex from either Ranma or Akane, one of denial, but none came. Maybe it was the shock of Ryoga's words or maybe even the ring of truth in his voice, but neither Ranma nor Akane managed to say anything. _Rollercoaster of a day indeed._

"It's been show to me over and over again. There's no doubt left to cling to in my mind now, you two love each other." Ryoga watched, as both his friends stood before him stunned, cheeks beginning to burn with a blush again.

"I don't..." Ranma stuttered.

"Don't love me, Ranma?" Akane asked quietly, the soul of her entire being focused on his eyes. She was like a lit candle in the face of a storm, a single breath from Ranma would put out her light forever.

"It's not that I don't...it's just..oh I am no good with...this type of thing..." he said, continuing to stutter, unable to deny those crystalline eyes.

"Then you do?" she said, her eyes glimmering with hope, but every other part of her being frozen..

"I-I...d-do...I do." Ranma admitted weakly at length, unable to deny those shimmering eyes of the truth. _Even if he didn't say those last two words, _Ryoga thought _his fate is sealed._

"I love you too." Akane said, throwing her arms around him and embracing him in a hug, a flood of emotions released in an instant.

At one time in his life, Ryoga would have either felt a murderous rage or been in the depths of depression after witnessing this. Yet, he felt a new emotion, one he couldn't quite put his finger on. It felt good which was very foreign to him...but he wasn't upset with the change. He took a step to leave and give them privacy.

"You know, you two love birds might want to do this in a more private place," Nabiki taunted as she appeared before the trio, "before Ukyo, Shampoo, or either Kuno finds out..." _Why can't people just butt out? _The rage that had forged him in the past suddenly took hold again, but with new purpose, a new target.

"I'll deal with all of them," Ryoga growled grimly, raising is umbrella like a sword. "One way or another." He declared to the world. _I won't allow anyone to undo this..I will not fail..a path of redemption has arisen before me._

"Glad to hear that...Ryoga. I have a plan, and it's already been paid for too." Nabiki informed the group as she pulled out some official looking papers. "And it might just work now too." 

__

*

*

"And that is the first stage of my plan." Nabiki said with pride creeping in the corners of her voice. 

Ryoga felt his weight shift uneasily. _Nabiki was crafty for certain, but this was unexpected even for her. She's obviously been hatching this plot for quite some time. It is too complicated for anyone to have come up with on the spur of the moment. But why would she have spent so much time thinking up this elaborate plan? It might work but it's so devious._

"But for the time being, we need to get Ranma and my little sister out of Nerima." Nabiki continued.

"Why do we need to leave Nabiki?" Akane asked.

"Ranma has the worst poker face on the planet. He would never manage to keep this secret." Nabiki pointed out

"Hey, I won when it mattered didn't I?" Ranma challenged.

Ignoring him, Nabiki continued "Besides, I don't think you'd do much better Akane. You are really an open book when it comes to emotions. It also serves other purposes."

"What do you mean open book?" Akane asked slightly miffed. Nabiki only gave her a smug grin.

"What's the other purposes?" Ryoga questioned the light of a zealot burning in his eyes. _We don't have time for a trip, we need resolution for the myriad of obstacles—I'll keep my word if it's the only thing I ever succeed in. _He caught himself,_ "Myriad of obstacles? When did I get so poetic?_

"The trip serves three other purposes besides the one I've mentioned actually." Nabiki replied, ignoring glares from both Ranma and Akane.

"First these papers need time to process." Nabiki said, holding tightly the forms that Ranma and Akane had signed. "I am not sure how much red tape I'll need to cut through, but I'll have it pushed through within a month for sure."

"A month!" Ranma exclaimed. 

"You've obviously never dealt with the government before." Nabiki remarked again smirking. "Besides that's the least important of my reasons."

"Please continue." Ryoga stated impatiently.

"The second reason.." Nabiki said, point a finger at Akane, "is you."

"Me?" Akane said, incredulously.

"Akane..." Nabiki began, "How many times have you been kidnapped since Ranma came to the dojo. Mousse, Tarso, Toma, Kirin, ... need I go on? Or been in danger..."

"Well, it's hardly my fault that it happens..." Akane stammered. "If it is anyone's fault, it is Ranma's they are usually his enemies."

"Hey, that's not fair, it's not like I asked them to kidnap you or anything." Ranma challenged. "Besides, who would want to kidnap an uncute, tomboy like y..."

"You dummy! I can't believe you...after you admi..." Akane nearly shouted, yet there was a hint of hurt in her eyes, that Ryoga could see so visibly now. 

Ryoga felt that murderous rage well up in him. He kept his fists clenched until they went white._ Damn you Ranma. Can't you take the blame for anything in your life. _Ryoga hesitated calming down considerably. _I didn't take the blame for my curse...it was my own fault not yours. And I didn't take the blame for my actions. Who am I to judge you? _A cold wave of depression overcame him._ I've failed so many times...so many false hopes. No, this is where things change! _He thought resolutely. _This is where I achieve my one and only ambition in life. This is where I make my stand._

"If you'll allow me to continue...Focus on what is important" Nabiki stated coldly and firmly. "It happens, no one disputes that. The question of whose fault it is, does not matter. Only what we can do about it."

"Some extra training would help Akane improve her skills and help her to defend herself better." Ryoga concluded, catching Nabiki's line of thought. 

"Exactly, and this will prove important especially considering how violent some of Ranma's "acquaintances" can be. I doubt Shampoo or Ukyo will take this well when they find out." Nabiki said.   
"And the Kunos have always been less than stable."

"You'd have to a find a really good martial artist to train a klutz like her to stand up to one of them." Ranma said carelessly.

"What do you mean by that Ranma!" Akane said hotly. Ranma winced and quickly clamped his mouth shut before he could get himself into more trouble.

"So it would be quite a challenge wouldn't it, Ranma?" Nabiki asked with mock sweetness in her voice, moving close to Ranma.

"Well, yes.." Ranma stuttered turning away from Akane to retreat from Nabiki's renewed assault.

"Ranma," Akane growled, "don't ignore me." 

"I don't think Ranma can handle it." Ryoga replied, catching unto Nabiki's plan. _Make him defend his pride and exert control over him. She really is cunning._

"Of course I can. I am the best at anything martial artists." Ranma said defensively. 

"I don't know Ranma, I mean we all know you are a great martial artist, but when have you ever taught anyone anything?" Ryoga said calmly, trying to suppress the grin on his face. 

__

"Ryoga does have a point Ranma." Nabiki said, carrying Ryoga's momentum. "You may be an excellent student, but you have no practice with teaching. We don't know how good you really are, my final reason is if you plan on taking over the dojo someday, you need to learn to teach."

"Fine, I'll show you both. I'll train Akane." Ranma nearly shouted.

"You really mean that? You'll train me for real!" Akane said half amazed, awestruck that Ranma was going to take her seriously at last. She scanned his eyes for some nonverbal confirmation

"Well...umm.." Ranma began, at a loss for how to continue, beginning to realize what he had just committed himself to.

"Great, you two start packing." Nabiki deftly said ending Ranma's argument, dismissing the railroaded couple. An eager Akane had taken Ranma's hand, practically dragging him into the house to began their packing.

Ryoga paused and reflected for a moment. _Nabiki is playing them both like a violin. Neither even realizes they've agreed to the first part of her plan because she has them focusing on details of the second. She's won even if she loses at this point._

"Nabiki," Ryoga started trailing off for a moment, "Why are you doing this?"

"Do I need a reason to help my little sister out?" Nabiki said with mock hurt showing on her face.

"Well..umm..no..." Ryoga said though not convincingly. "It just seems out of character for you...usually everything is about money in the end to you. Sometimes I think you'd sell your own soul for enough." Ryoga continued laughing weakly at the end, and placing his hand behind his head.

"You are more clever than I gave you credit for, Ryoga." She said venomously pointing a figure at him. "Of course I am getting paid for doing this." Nabiki nonchalantly continued.

"Who?!" Ryoga blurted out.

"Genma and Daddy worked out a deal with me some time ago. But I wanted to wait until I was sure."

"Sure of what?" Ryoga asked.

Nabiki's features darkened and she slowly moved closer to Ryoga invading his comfort zone. _I won't let her intimidate me, _Ryoga thought as he retreated from her advance. _She can't hurt me, I am the martial artist, she is just a normal girl. _In spite of himself, he mused, _Or is she?_

"I suppose I owe you an explanation, but only because of your actions today. Without you it wouldn't have worked...so neatly. You are not to mention this to anyone. Understood?" Nabiki said slowly, watching the effect of every word on Ryoga's face.

"Yes." Ryoga said, swallowing hard. _What have I gotten myself into?_

"I need to know if it's the truth that Ranma makes Akane happy." She said her voice as cold as death. "You are going to find that out for me." Her statement was so sharp, there was no element of a question in it. "Come along and get your things ready and don't wander off." She said as if instructing a young dog. After Ryoga had walked out of sight, to the front of the house, Nabiki said under her breath, "It will be a long journey, with a conclusion that remains to be written."


	5. Chapter Four Training

Chapter 4 "Training"

*

"There is nothing training cannot do. Nothing is above its reach. It can turn bad morals to good; it can destroy bad principles and recreate good ones; it can lift men to angelship." Mark Twain

*

__

Ryoga slowly walked behind Akane and Ranma. They had decided that Mount Terror was the best place to train. It was a heavily wooded area primarily, but at the top of the mountain there were also many boulders. A river slashed back and forth on one side of the mountain and several hot springs could also be found between the far side from where they were. _The springs are just alittle too far from civilization to be a resort, but maybe someday_, Ryoga thought, _I hope not though_.

Despite the lay of the land, this place had more sentimental value than anything else. _It was on this hallowed ground that I learned the Bakusai-ten-ketsu from Cologne. It was here that I fought Ranma for Akane. It's only fitting that I try to repair what I've done wrong in this place._

The three had been nearly silent as they walked, with the silence only being shattered by the occasionally attempt at small talk. The implications of the morning's events were slowly sinking in to the trio.

Ryoga's mind wandered as the silence continued. _We are getting close now. I remember this place. _He recalled the steps that the fight had taken after Ranma had run away. _That was probably the closest I've ever come to beating Ranma in a fair fight._

His mind rebelled from that last idea. _The Shishi houkou-dan. I was so close to defeating him after I perfected it. If he hadn't tricked me...I would have won. _Slyly, he thought, _My weakness was my source of power...Akane. Perhaps I've strengthened the hole in my defenses. It doesn't matter though I have no quarrel with Ranma now. What am I going to do if I do succeed?_

"This is the place to make camp." Ranma announced breaking Ryoga's reverie.

The trio began to make camp. Again an eerie silence hung over the soon to be camp. _I've got to shake off this dreary overcast._

"So Ranma, have decided how you want to proceed in Akane's training?" Ryoga asked.

"Not completely. I think we should start slow and work on the basics first and then move on." Ranma answered.

"Ranma, I can handle the more advanced training. I am a martial artist too." Akane replied as if on cue.

"I think Ranma's right. Best to start slow and find out where you are skill wise." Ryoga said.

"I can't believe you are actually agreeing with me..."

"I won't oppose you...unless I think you are wrong Ranma. Times change, adapt or be left behind." Ryoga challenged. 

"That's one of the best parts of Anything Goes Martial Arts." Ranma said proudly.

"And don't worry, I won't hold back my opinion."

"Ok, what should we start with then?" Akane said reluctantly.

"My first idea was running. I know you jog all the time, but being able to have the endurance to run at full speed helps a lot I think." Ranma instructed.

The remainder of the day was spent running around the top of Mount Terror. Running was split between running races from place to place and a lighthearted game of tag. All three youths were thoroughly exhausted by nightfall. Ryoga carefully prepared a fire using his well-honed skills and a tinderbox while Ranma and Akane "discussed" dinner plans.

"Ranma, I think I should cook dinner." Akane repeated for the thousandth time.

"I don't think this is a good idea, Akane...just umm...well..." Ranma countered, hesitating in deciding what was better between death by her cooking or mallet.

"It is the least I can do for you two for training me." Akane said, a smile beaming on her face. "Besides, I won't get any better if I don't practice."

"But there's not a hospital around here for miles..." Ranma blurted out.

"RANMA!" Akane growled, mallet materializing in her hand.

With a flash of flint against steel, Ryoga finally managed to ignite a fire. Carefully, he kindled the flame and let it grow. The sudden spark wasn't the only unexpected flash.

"Actually," Ryoga interrupted with a flash of insight, "I think it would be an excellent idea, under one condition." 

A startled Akane dropped her mallet and grateful Ranma positioned himself behind Ryoga.

"What's the condition," Ranma joked, "We don't have to eat it?" His only response from Akane was an angry glare, her eyes narrowing.

"I just want to watch you cook it." Ryoga answered.

"But you'll distract me." Akane countered.

"I give you my word I won't say anything until you are done or unless I think it is important. I mostly just want to observe." Ryoga squeaked

"Ok, great! Let me get my things ready and I'll get started." Akane replied, happily.

As soon as she had stepped away to start dinner, both martial artists breathed a sigh of relief, but for different reasons. 

"Are you crazy?" Ranma demanded

"I've got a plan. Well maybe." Ryoga said.

"Maybe? Maybe?" Ranma said sarcastically.

"Don't worry about it. Trust me. I'll explain it to you later ok?" Ryoga replied his thoughts elsewhere.

"I am going do die." Ranma said, resigning himself to his fate.

"What was that, Ranma?" Akane said coldly, sneaking up behind him.

"Nothing, nothing at all..." Ranma said nervously.

"Akane I am ready when you are." Ryoga pointed out.

"Oh, right." She said and began to cook.

Ryoga watched her focusing all of his attention on how she cooked while Ranma went out in search of dry firewood to feed the fire during the night. Her face was a mask of determination. She moved rigidly and kept referring to a cookbook. The way she combined the ingredients it was almost as if she was attacking them. Ryoga noted that the amounts of ingredients weren't precisely measured out, but rather her measurements were somewhat crude because of her haste. In her frenzy she picked up vinegar instead of one of the other spices.

"Ah Akane..."

"What is it? I am busy. Can't you see that?" she said exasperated. 

"That's vinegar."

"Oh, ok. Thanks."

After three more near disasters, the meal was finished. As Akane prepared to serve the meal, Ryoga heard Ranma approach from his trip to gather firewood. Quickly the lost boy moved in and intercepted his rival. 

Gruffly taking a hold of Ramna's collar, Ryoga harshly whispered into his ear, "Eat it and like it. Got it?" Before Ranma could respond, Ryoga dragged him directly into the camp. 

"Let go of me..." Ranma began.

"Ranma's ready for dinner now. We don't want to keep Akane waiting do we?" Ryoga stated a wolfish grin on his face.

"Really?!" Akane exclaimed. A brilliant smile crossed her face as she pushed a steaming plate into Ranma's hands.

Slowly Ranma picked up his chopsticks. The pigtailed boy watched Ryoga's face for any hint of mercy, but the lost boy only hardened his gaze. Resigned to his fate, Ranma reluctantly began to eat.

"This isn't terrible, it's only bad." Ranma exclaimed, the shock clear in his voice.

Akane did not say a single word, merely watched Ranma intently. Suddenly she started preparing a second plate for Ranma, who was rapidly making his way through his first plate. Ryoga snidely thought, _With the way he eats, he should have gotten my curse._

The trio finished the dinner and the two exhausted youths of the School of Anything Goes Martial Arts went to sleep. Two tents had been set up, one for Akane and one for the two young men. Ryoga watched the fire intently as they drifted off, knowing he'd only get a few hours of rest. _I don't sleep much anymore. Too much to be done, too little time. How does the poem by the American writer Frost go? "Miles to go before I sleep." So many miles it seems._

Ryoga opened his backpack and pulled out a book. Slowly he turned to his bookmark, and began reading trying to stay awake to avoid the eventual nightmares that came when he was asleep. After several hours he finally put his head down, and let sleep wash away his weariness.

*

*

Nabiki looked up from her book when she heard the crash. As the smoke cleared, the lavender haired girl stood in the opening in the wall. _At least Uyko used the door when she came._

"Where is Ranma? You tell Shampoo now." Shampoo demanded.

"I can only tell you the same thing I told Ukyo, and the Kunos. He went on a training trip." Nabiki said, pausing a second, "With Akane." Nabiki carefully studied Shampoo's face, as it changed to a grimace of anger, after her little addition.

"When Ranma be back? Which way did Ranma go?" she said after reclaiming her cool. "Shampoo make deal if you tell Shampoo."

"Well, they left with Ryoga...you know his sense of direction. Maybe they'll be back in a couple of weeks." The Tendo daughter merely shrugged.

The Amazon girl sulked off, and Nabiki couldn't help but be amused. _Who says you can't mix business and pleasure?_

*

*

The days rolled by in quick succession. Slowly but surely the three martial artists moved on to not merely exercises to work out their bodies, but those to hone their skills. Crude obstacle courses filled with, jumping on narrow ledges, climbing over crude barricades, swimming through hot springs, and a myriad of other activities tested their skills. 

Ryoga silently noted that things between Ranma and Akane seemed to be getting ever-so slightly better. With Ryoga's watching Akane when she cooked, the fatal flaws in her recipes were prevented and seemed to be occurring less frequently. The food was a long way from being gourmet or even average, but at least it was edible. _Maybe she's evening learning. She deserves it after all the effort she puts into it. Or maybe it is just chance. Regardless such a simple thing has made quite a difference but the two of them. _After three days of such activities things changed.

On the morning of the fourth day after he awoke, Ryoga realized that Ranma was gone. Ryoga silently went about his morning routine, at length reading a book after Ranma had not yet returned. He covertly turned an eye on Akane's tent mentally confirming she was still asleep and still there. _I don't think they'd just leave me here...not really. Besides they would just leave me and not bother trying to be sneaky about it. I wonder where Ranma is though. I don't want to have to explain this to Akane. Part of me is afraid of her now...I can't stand being in her presence except when my duty forces my back against a wall. Enough thinking, focus on this book._

After several long moments, Ryoga, watched Akane arise from her tent. Still trying to avoid looking at her directly, Ryoga following her morning ritual out of the corner of his eye, his noise firmly planted in a book, hiding behind it. Without saying a word time him, she began cooking breakfast. Eager to maintain the silence Ryoga merely observed her preparations. By the time she had finished the meal, the silence was still present, hanging thickly in the air. _Amazing she didn't seem to make any mistakes. _He studied her carefully. _She's not said a word to me without Ranma around. She doesn't seem angry but part of her must be. Things never will be the same, but I have no one to curse but myself. Revealing my curse was a curse onto itself...how ironic..._

Appearing from behind a tree, Ranma walked slowly toward the camp. Suddenly, he broke out into a dead sprint closing in on the camp rapidly, his face a mask of concentration. _He's going to attack, _Ryoga thought, already realizing he was caught unaware.

Ryoga leapt to his feet, and as quickly as he could assumed a defensive position. However, he was not quick enough. Ranma had already moved into striking distance and achieved control of the momentum of that battle. It was all Ryoga could manage to supply the blocks to counter Ranma's offense.

Ranma spun suddenly and fiercely attacked Ryoga's flank. Again barely maneuvering out of harm's way, Ryoga was forced to fight a losing battle. Ranma pushed Ryoga back, again relying on his initial advantage. _I've got to disrupt his attack or I am done for..._

"Bakusai-ten-ketsu" Ryoga yelled as his finger brushed the ground. A small explosion ensued and before the debris had even cleared he and Ranma had exchanged at least a dozen blows, each blocked.

The flurry of blows continued to cycle back and forth, move and counter move without either martial artist giving up any ground. _Ranma's defenses are too well made, he's too fast. I'll never break through them, unless I am uncharacteristically lucky. If I am to win this scrimmage, I'll have to wear him down. Surely I can outlast him? It's all about not making a mistake. If I don't mess up, he can't beat me. _

"Tenshin Amaguri-ken" Ranma screamed, with confidence oozing into his voice.

Ryoga blocked strike after strike as Ranma picked up speed. _I can barely see his hands moving and he's still getting faster. He's too fast. I can't counter this. No, not this time. I need to seek with the mind's eye. Let my subconscious focus on total and complete defense._

Without thinking about each individual hit, Ryoga let his subconscious take over. Minutes crept by without any quarter being given. Finally the flurry ended and both young men separated. Ryoga risked a glance and he found Ranma panting after his prolonged attack. 

"When did you get so good?" Ranma asked, still breathing hard.

"I've got a clearer focus now, Ranma." Ryoga stated proudly, while catching his breath. I_'ve finally stalemated Ranma in a fair fight. Well, sorta. I wonder if I could beat him now with the "Perfected Shishi houkou-dan? I was close, so very close when we fought, but I let him distract me. No more distractions for me._

At that moment, the teapot whistled from camp, signaling it was overheating. Ryoga reflexively glanced over at the pot and Akane. It was at that moment, Ranma exploited this lapse in his defensives.

"Is that so huh? Nice focus." Ranma questioned as Ryoga picked himself up from the dirt.

"Maybe I still need alittle more training." Ryoga said weakly as he joined his two friends for breakfast.

As Ryoga sat down next to his two friends he suddenly noticed something was horribly wrong. _Ranma's eating slowly, not quickly. But why? _The minutes crept passed.

"So Akane, did you watch our sparring session?" Ranma asked at length.

"Yes, but you two make it look easy. It's almost looked like a play." Akane concluded.

"What do you mean?" Ranma asked.

"It look scripted and rehearsed rather than like a battle." Akane explained.

"It wasn't though." Ryoga said considering what she had said.

"Maybe it was." Ranma stated unexpected. "When I launched an attack, you really only had one or two choices to stop it. To do anything else would pretty much cost you the match."

"I really couldn't deviate too much. You had the momentum, you had the control. I don't know about scripted though." Ryoga mused. "Maybe a better comparison would be dancing."

"Dancing?" Akane asked incredulous.

"There are set patterns, but they can fluctuate as well." Ryoga said revealing his train of thought.

"Dancing? Fluctuate? Deviate? Ryoga you've been reading too much." Ranma stated.

"Maybe, just trying to explain things more clearly." 

"But you bring up a good point. Akane needs to develop the same sixth sense we have."

"How do I do that?" Akane questioned.

"Practice. Lot's of practice." Ranma replied.

"I am up to it." She announced.

"Let's get going then." Ryoga said putting his plate down.

The remainder of the day was spent honing dodging, blocking, and parrying as were the next several. Ryoga noted that Akane while clumsy at first, was beginning to gain speed with repeating the patterns. _I probably shouldn't be so surprised. I mean after all she's a much more skilled ice skater than Ranma or I am. It's just a matter of getting the right assistance in your training. I'd never have done so much so quickly without Cologne's help in mine._

The midday and evening meals became discussions of tactics and areas to target for improvement. Ryoga kept his guard high though Ranma and Akane often seemed to lower theirs considerable. _I just want this resolved. Being around them isn't right anymore, I don't deserve it._

One night as the other two prepared for bed, things were particularly quiet. Ryoga just continued to read as the hours past. _Sleep brings no rest for me. Just formless nightmares_.

After several hours, Ranma awoke with a start. Quietly he slipped out of the tent and moved to sit next to Ryoga at the fire. Ryoga acknowledged his presence with a quick nod, without a word.

"Still up eh?" Ranma asked.

"Yes, just reading this book." Ryoga replied quietly.

"What book?" 

"It's Hamlet, by a long dead British author."

"Same guy that did Romeo and Juliet right?" Ranma asked, after a moment, almost as if he had just suddenly recalled it.

"Yes, I think so."

"Any good? What's it about?"

"The main character is Hamlet. Hamlet's father dies and he pretends to be crazy in order to avenge him." Ryoga replied without really thinking about. Suddenly an idea struck the lost boy. "But it has a really interesting side plot."

"Oh, what's that about?" Ranma asked, eager to continue the conversation.

"Well, there's this girl Hamlet sorta likes but when he pretends to be insane, she doesn't take it so well. He insults her a lot during it and this pushes her over the edge. She commits suicide and Hamlet mourns her terribly." Ryoga explained.

The lost boy risked a glance at his friend. Ranma's face was ashen. An uneasy silence descended on the camp. 

"So why did you want me to eat Akane's cooking? You said you'd explain it to me, but never have." Ranma said, attempting to change the subject.

"We've not had a moment alone yet. Did it kill you?" Ryoga challenged.

"No, but it might have." Ryoga rolled his eyes.

"For once think Ranma, and think carefully. Why does she continue to cook things for you?"

"I don't know..."

"Ukyo cooks for you. Shampoo cooks for you. Kodachi cooks for you." Ryoga explained.

"I don't eat Kodachi's food."

"You would if it weren't riddled with poisons and paralyzing powder."

"Maybe."

"My point is Akane cooks to show her affection for you because she is too embarrassed to show it directly. When you eat Shampoo or Ukyo's cooking, and reject Akane's, you reject her affection." With a dark grin on his face, "Just like you show your affection when you rescue her."

"That's not the same thing." Ranma said instinctively.

"Why do you rescue her then?"

"It's the right thing to do."

"Remember when we had the fight at the zoo, so long ago. During the end of it, I launched all those bandannas. Who did you worry about? Those other students who didn't have any training. Or Akane who did."

"I-I didn't have time to think about that." Ranma stuttered.

"Sure, whatever. Who is lying to himself now?" Ryoga replied sharply. "I don't get you, why is this so hard? You'll take on demons and worse, but you can't admit the truth to the girl you love."

"Ss--she might not..."

"Fear of rejection? Here's another fear for you. How long before your luck runs out and something happens? One of you two die. Shampoo uses a love potion on you. Some new fiancée Genma promised you to comes out of the woodwork. Or a billion other things?"

"Telling her wouldn't change those things." Ryoga grinned inwardly. _He's admitted it again._

"No it wouldn't you are right it wouldn't. But you wouldn't be alone anymore."

"Alone?"

"She'd be with you, even more so than she is now. She's living in fear of you picking one of the other girls."

"I would never.." Ranma started.

"I know that and you know that, but she's insecure." Ryoga interrupted. "Face the facts, things can't remain like they are."

"I don't know..." he trailed off.

"Ranma," Ryoga asked suddenly, "Would you do me a favor?"

"What?"

"Too often in my life, I've blamed you without understanding. It's time to change this. I want to understand you. Tell me about Akane. And Kuno. Nabiki and Kasumi. Tell me about everything, every detail everything you can remember."

A moment passed between the two young men. Ryoga felt Ranma studying his gaze. _He's measuring me...seeing my intent._

Without another word, Ranma began explaining the story of his life to Ryoga. It can out slowly and awkwardly at first, but then sputtered quickly in large bursts. The next few nights followed this pattern. Meals continued to be strategic sessions, training was long and intense, and the nights were filled with Ranma and Ryoga discussing the past and realizing things about it that had remained unseen. Both were nervous that their time in training was so quickly passing.

Ryoga quietly watched Akane's progression. _Slowly but surely she is gaining skill through her dedication._ Ryoga also noted that on average he had to say less and less about her cooking. He'd only speak up when she was about to make a fatal flaw. Akane seemed much calmer without undo pressure from outside sources. _Much more in control of her temper and the amounts of ingredients as well_.

As if his thoughts were a prophecy at breakfast Ranma brought up a similar point.

"Akane, I think it's time we move on to the last important thing you need, control." Ranma began.

"What do you mean exactly?" she asked.

"Do your remember when Cologne told me about a Soul of Ice?" 

Akane nodded mutely. Ryoga picked at his breakfast, unsure of what if anything he could contribute.

"A soul of ice is concentration. You let everything go, everything that doesn't matter." 

"I think I understand. Why is this so important though?" She inquired.

"You focus completely on the battle you are fighting and don't let emotion cloud your judgement." Ranma explained slowly. "It is the last step before you can focus your Ki into a battle aura."

"Control isn't easily mastered." Ryoga grunted bitterly from experience.

"I can do it." Akane replied smoothly.

"Actually I think you are closer than you think, Akane." Ranma informed the others.

"Why do you say that, Ranma?" Ryoga asked.

"I've seen the difference in the way she cooks now.." Ranma began. Akane's eyes narrowed briefly before Ranma continued. "This has nothing to do with how it tastes, though it has been improving...just the way you control your temper while you cook." Ryoga carefully noted Akane's features softened immensely with even the vaguest of compliments. 

"What does a battle aura do exactly? I know I've seen Happousai paralyze you with it, but no one has really ever explained it." Akane asked. 

"Battle auras are how Ki is directed into doing things. Most people that can manage to use never even realize what they are doing." Ranma explained. "I never really realized that I put out a battle aura at all until learning the Hiryuu shouten-ha. Even then I didn't learn to consciously manifest energy until Mouko takabisha."

"How does it help you if you don't know it's there?" Akane questioned.

"When you split those stone blocks, you've focused your ki. Or when we first encounter Ryoga, remember how he created a crater with the tip of his umbrella? Or how he sliced that tree in half with his belt? Those are all uses of ki without thinking about it, and a dozen other things." Ranma stated.

"Ok, what are we waiting for? Let's start working on this." Akane exclaimed happily, starting down the path to the place where the training was usually done.

And work they did. Several days passed in quick succession each bringing more progress than the one before it. _I wonder how much time we have left now, probably less than a week. It's hard to believe three weeks have based so quickly, _reflected Ryoga while sitting quietly reading on evening. Suddenly, Ryoga watched Ranma turn over and wake up.

"I am going to take a walk." Ranma said. Ryoga merely nodded in response.

A few minutes later Akane arose. _Sleepless night for everyone tonight._

"Ryoga, could I ask you a question?" Akane began.

"Ask away, I'll answer it to the best of my ability.

"Why did you...not tell me about your curse?" she inquired.

He looked away from her for a moment into the night. _I knew from the beginning this day would come...I guess I'll just say it. First thing that comes to my mind, starting at the beginning. _

"I don't have explanations. Only excuses. If you really want to hear it, I'll tell you why it took so long." Ryoga stated slowly, trailing off at the end.

"I want to hear it." Akane stated bravely.

"I guess I've always felt to some degree my life didn't have any meaning...I don't know my parents well at all...we all get lost...I didn't have many... well any friends. When Ranma crossed me by stealing that bread...it gave me a purpose no matter how petty. That's why I followed him all the way through China...simply I didn't have anything better to do. I know I am pathetic. I guess you know that."

Ryoga took a deep breath focusing on these words before continuing, not being able to meet her gaze. _Just let it come out, Ryoga, from the heart._

"After I was dumped into the spring...I looked for someone to blame but myself. Ranma was the only person I could...the only person I knew. I hated the girl and the Panda for what they had done to me...but I didn't know how to track them down...not with my sense of direction. So, I just blamed Ranma for everything and he gave me purpose to a formless life...to make him miserable for these imagined wrongs. That's why I was so furious when I found out he was that girl."

Ryoga mentally realigned himself, forcing himself to meet her gaze.

"After our second battle...I sorta of understood he cared for you. I mean after all he only protected you from those bandanas, when there were a lot of people there with no training what so ever...and he just well brushed me off after you guys had your argument. Turned his back on me completely, disarmed me, and ignored me."

"How did you know that he..." she trailed off.

"It is blatantly obvious. I am a fool for having missed it for so long—I guess the want to believe something wasn't true lead me on. I was jealous you held his attention, and I was ignored. And I felt bad that... I had at least was partly responsibly for cutting your hair. I am truly sorry."

"I was just shocked. I've gotten over it." Ryoga noticed a wistful look in here eye. _I wonder why?_

"We fought again and I was so ashamed that Ranma learned I had a curse. Trapped in that form from that rainy night, I ran from him but got lost and ended up in your room. I was hurt, cold, lonely, and so, so ashamed of my curse. And out of this darkness...you came."

Ryoga swallowed deeply clearing his throat before continuing.

"I guess the only metaphor I can offer up is a lighthouse. You were the ray of light that pulled me from the depths of despair. That's why you saying even you hated me...let me master the Shishi houkou-dan. I suppose that's my reality now."

"I don't hate you..." she continued.

"But I'll never have your trust again. I can accept that. I guess that first night I should have resisted the temptation...but I was just so mad at Ranma, so I let it happen to hurt him and I guess I was so lost in you...you had delivered me from the depths of hell itself. After that...I couldn't stand to tell you because I didn't want you to hate me...so I was forced into this viscous cycle...of damning myself even more."

Ryoga calmly kept his voice steady and cold.

"Seeing Ranma get jealous...it was revenge I guess in a way. And the way you talked about him sometimes to me...I guess I thought that you truly hated him. He would insult you or do something stupid to make you upset...or not eat what you worked so hard to cook for him and rarely bought you anything...so I tried to become that person, that would do all of those things that you wanted. I'd only give you kind words, never try to make you upset, eat anything you cooked, and I gave you as many souvenirs as I could..."

Ryoga noticed her eyes seemed on the verge of tears. _It's the truth, just let it out, so everyone can heal._

"All in the hopes that someday, I'd win your heart. Not knowing all along, you'd fallen so deeply for him and so completely. Or not wanting to believe it"

"Why now? Why change now?" she said softly.

"Selfish reasons. First I guess I feel I've not been a very honorable person when it comes to you. I want to make up for that if I can. And I-I guess seeing you happy is what matters to me most in the world. Even if I am not a part of it. That's why I am doing all this. " Ryoga took a death breath. "Hopefully whatever plot, Nabiki has hatched will take care of the last few hurtles to your happiness..."

Ryoga cleared his throat again. "Actually Ranma couldn't sleep well. He went on a walk." Ryoga pointed in the direction that Ranma had left in. "He seemed to have a lot on his mind."

"Do you think I..." Akane started.

"I know you should."

Without another word spoken, Ryoga watched Akane step out of the firelight into the darkness.

Ryoga sat quietly for a moment after Akane had disappeared. _I need to know what they say when they met...I need to know or Nabiki will skin me alive. No, I need to know if I've undone the damage I've inflicted. _Ryoga quickly stood up and followed Akane at a comfortable distance.

The two heirs to the Anything Goes Martial Artists school soon encountered each other. Hiding within a bush, Ryoga carefully studied their faces, illuminated by the moonlight. He could hear them talking in whispers but not make out what they were saying. Deftly, the lost by edged closer as the minutes paced.

"—learned so much so quickly. Ranma, I want to thank you for training me." Akane said, her voice sweet as honey.

"It's nothin' at all. Probably something I should have been doing all along." He replied.

A quiet and awkward moment passed between them.

"Ranma, when you said you lo—" she began.

Ranma's gaze met Akane's and in that moment everything unsaid passed between them.

"I love you, Akane Tendo." Ranma said simply.

"I love you too, Ranma Saotome." She replied with equal elegance. 

She leaned forward face fully illuminated by the bright moonlight and the young couple kissed for the first time, a long and fulfilling kiss.

Quietly stalking away from the couple, Ryoga thought _I've won_. Sternly he corrected himself, _No Akane you've obtained what you so rightly deserve. You too Ranma Sealed for eternity._

For the first night since the Christmas party, Ryoga slept a well.

*

*

The remainder of the trip passed very quickly. Ryoga smiled as he saw a new closeness manifest itself between Ranma and Akane. A bond had been foraged between them, that was truly indestructible

The only event that broke their routine was Akane had accidentally bleached some of the shirts white while doing laundry. Ryoga while packing for the return to Nerima closely examined his shirt.

__

From yellow to white. How very ironic. The symbolism for yellow has always been cowardly. And so I was. And now white the symbol of purity. Maybe I've grown some. But there's still much to do.

"Stand ready, those that stand in the ways of my friend's choice." Ryoga whispered to himself. "Because now you stand against me as well."


	6. Chapter Five Transcend

Chapter 5 "Transcend"

*

"...And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course." - Kahlil Gibran

*

*

Ryoga shivered in the darkness of the early morning as he stood at the gate to the Tendo home. They had arrived with just a few hours until dawn. Nabiki had appeared moments earlier ushering both Ranma and Akane inside, and cryptically telling him not to get lost while she attended to them. Closing his eyes, Ryoga stood focusing on the task at hand, almost meditating as if in a trance.

After several minutes, Ryoga heard footsteps. Opening his eyes he was surprised to see Ukyo with box undoubtedly filled with okonomiyaki in hand. She was predictably approaching the gate. _I am the gatekeeper_, he thought grimly.

"I saw Ranma and you returned today. I don't suppose you know where he has been all this time." Ukyo asked, adding as if an after thought. "And Akane".

Ryoga turned to face Ukyo as if for the first time. She stepped back involuntarily. 

"You are a mirror of me." He whispered to himself.

"What on earth are you talking about?" she answered only half hearing him.

"You are Ranma's friend, much like I was Akane's." Ryoga said again quietly, however he was sure she heard him this time. Her eyes narrowed at the word was.

"Was? Explain yourself, jackass." _Maybe she's never forgiven me for the Tunnel of Lost Love. I would never have forgiven myself if I'd succeeded. _

"Not important." Ryoga replied

"I'll decide that." She snapped.

"What do you want most in life? What's your primary goal?" Ryoga demanded, ignoring her. _I am copying Cologne now I? Asking the questions that would best remain unsaid. Maybe they need to come out, this darkness needs light._

"Marry Ranma honey of course." Uyko stopped for a second after her automatic response. "Why do you care?"

"Over your art, okonomiyaki?" Ryoga said turning a critical eye to her face.

"Of course." She said, stalling for a second. Ryoga's only response was a dark grin. "What is it, jackass? Why that wolfish grin?"

"Why?" 

"Why what?"

"Why marry Ranma?"

"So he'll be happy." Ukyo said in a tone as to denote it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"So it's not about family honor? That's only means to legitimize your end." Ryoga retorted almost mocking her seriousness.

"No, I was upset at first with him, you remember that you were there, but I just wanted revenge not to marry him. I want to marry him because that will make him happy and me too." Uyko said almost lost day dreaming in her own words.

"So couldn't you rephrase you goal as simply Ranma being happy." Ryoga replied.

"I guess so, but..." She was cut off by Ryoga's almost jackal like laughter.

Ryoga turned away to face the night for a short moment, only a couple of seconds. When he turned around all mirth was gone for his features, especially his eyes. They almost glowed red in the darkness.

"Do you remember the Christmas party, Ukyo?" After she nodded, he continued, "Do your remember what we overheard." His voice was lacking any semblance of a question. She swallowed deeply.

"Yes."

"So isn't it clear that Ranma is in love with Akane. Just like she loves Ranma, not me."

"It doesn't mean anything." Ukyo said defensively.

"Why doesn't it? Because it's the truth?" he replied harshly.

"It was just that one time..." she whispered.

"Was it?" Ryoga demanded, almost yelling. He caught himself and said softly but firmly, "I deceived myself like you once."

"I am not deceived." Ukyo said, tears burning in her eyes.

"You've not answered my question, was it just that one time or has it been repeated over and over again to us...Can you set aside your emotion and use your intelligence. I know you are intelligent. Or am I wrong and you are as blind as Kuno?"

"I am not like Kuno!" she sobbed, collapsing to her knees.

Ryoga paused for a moment and offered his hand to the fallen form of Ukyo.

"Ukyo, your love is unrequited, like mine for Akane. You've been living in the past for ten years now, it's time to end this dark charade." Ryoga said calmly. 

She sobbed again tears marring her pretty face. Ukyo held her head down unable to face him.

"Let Ranma be happy, even if that means it is not quite what you intended." Ryoga whispered. _Like I've done for Akane._

Ukyo slowly staggered to her feet. Ukyo then did what Ryoga had done many times before. She ran into the darkness with tears streaming down her face.

*

*

"Are you sure you remember everything I told you?" Nabiki asked.

Taking the papers she had given him, Ryoga mutely nodded.

"I didn't expect you to run into Ukyo, but it might have played into our hand."

"What did you plan?" Ryoga said hesitantly.

"I had forty-two different calculations done for the worth of her cart, of course adjusted for interest over the past years. I planned on that being the basis for what Ranma truly owed her given that her engagement was always null and void. After that it was up to Ranma...not a proposition I would like to bet on. However, the trip did seem to work."

"Work? How?"

"The barrier between them is gone."

"How can you tell?"

"As I said before they are both open books. I make my business propositions based on my understanding of people. Did you expect me to not know, especially since I've lived with them?

"I guess..."

"No time for further explanations. Here take this." She coldly stated brandishing a mechanic device and what looked like a hearing aid. 

"What is it?" Ryoga asked.

"It's a listening device. I'll be able to hear you while you wear it and you'll be able to get important information from me...like directions to your destination. Put it on." Nabiki explained impatiently.

"Where is my destination?" Ryoga asked still confused, struggling with the listening device.

"You need to get to Shampoo and Cologne. Mousse won't interfere. After that all major threats are accounted for." Nabiki clarified.

"What about Kuno and Kodachi?"

Nabiki only smiled in response.

*

*

The noble heir to the house of Kuno, sat impatiently drinking his morning tea, though the sun was yet to show in the sky. It was his ritual to rise early to continue his training. _I hardly need it, my skills are superior to the ramble._ He kept an eye on his twisted sister Kodachi and equally crazy father_. I still don't believe he is my father...how could the great Tatewaki Kuno be related to, much less the son of such a madman._

" Sasuke, where are you man? Haven't you fetched the mail yet?" Kuno bellowed taking out his rage on his hapless manservant.

Rushing to his master's side, Sasuki humbly offered forth one piece of mail to his master. Tatewaki Kuno snatched it away without as much as a gesture of gratefulness. A quick gesture later and the letter was opened.

"Mistress Kodachi," Sasuke stammered, "Your grace has received a letter as well."

"Give it to my right now then." She said, practically strangling the manservant to get the letter.

Tatewaki Kuno began to peruse the important parts of the letter he had received. _You, Tatewaki Kuno, have been recognized for your extraordinary talent in Kendo. Due to your performance record over the last years, you have been selected to compete for the possibility to be a member of Japan's Olympic Game team...This is an honor of the highest order.... You will receive an all expenses paid trip to a resort in Hawaii to develop your talent. _He paused thinking it over, _Finally I'll be able to get away from my sister and that man...but what of Akane Tendo and the pigtailed girl? And the vengeance I owe Ranma Saotome. I suppose I'll have to wait until after I return in glory. Yes, then both Akane Tendo and the pigtailed girl will rush into my victorious arms!_

"Brother dearest, you'll never believe this." Kodachi said smugly followed by her maniacal laughter.

"What is it woman? I am busy reading this letter." Tatewaki replied curtly.

"I've been selected to compete for the Rhythmic Gymnastics Olympic Team." She replied.

"In Hawaii?" he asked, aghast. "It cannot be. You've only been selected to for the opportunity to compete, not for the team." Kuno retorted.

"So it seems...but I am sure my competitors will have unfortunate accidents." Kodachi cackled. "Wait how did you know the training was in Hawaii?" 

"I've been selected too." Kuno said begrudgingly. _Oh, what a terrible fate for one so noble as I._

"Da be great news. Mez agoing to go wit youz." Principal Kuno stated proudly. "Wez be juan big happy family on da Island."

*

*

Ukyo wandered in the darkness, running without destination without thought. Slowly and quietly she stumbled down a grassy hill that over looked Nerima's canals. She peered into the water, light only coming from the starlight, to see her reflection.

A bedraggled and disarrayed young girl starred back at her. _Strength, _she thought_, I need strength now. _As she knelt down besides her image, she became to make her appearance more presentable. _Why? _She thought, barely holding back the sobs. _Why not me? I've done everything right and damn him I love him._

But he doesn't love me. I can't make him love me like I love him. She felt warm tears streak down her checks. _It's over, I've lost again. I've been abandoned again. I am alone. Ryoga, you jackass why did you tell me this? I was fine before._

Was I fine? Ukyo thought in the silent. _Was I fine? _She repeated to herself. _I was clinging to a dream that was only a dream. I knew Ranma loved her, I knew all too well. I know she'll make him happier than I could. Otherwise he'd have chosen me. I've got to be happy for him—that's all I have left. _

No, that's not the only thing. I have my art, I have my restaurant. Maybe if I am lucky I have some friends too. Tomorrow, she vowed, _tomorrow I'll straighten this out._

Ukyo sat in the darkness, waiting for the sun to rise on tomorrow.

__

*

*

"Yes, I am sure that's the right way." Nabiki repeated for the third time into the headset. _Ryoga, you could get place simply by reversing your instincts. They are never right. _

The door to her room opened, and Nabiki put her hand over the microphone. She beckoned Ranma and Akane closer.

"Look, I don't have much time or he'll get lost." She gestured to the two pairs of headphones on the table. "Put those on, you'll hear what I hear. He doesn't know your listening nor should he. We'll know if the plan fails or succeeds soon enough."

Akane began to ask a question, but Nabiki cut her off with a stern look.

"Just listen, then decide." _This is your chance, Ryoga, your fate is in your own hands now._

*

*

Breathing heavily, Ryoga finally came to a rest. Before him stood the Cat Cafe in all it's simple splendor. _Focus, I need to focus. This is the last stop, the last battle. If I can make this work, it's all over. _Resolution filled his spirit, _I will do this._

"I've arrived." Ryoga stated into the microphone.

"And it only took you to sunrise. I am impressed." Nabiki said, the sarcasm dripping in her voice.

"I did it ok?! And it is not sunrise yet even." Ryoga retorted.

"Greetings Ryoga." Cologne stated, slowly leaving her restaurant. "What are you doing here so early? The battle aura you are generating could wake the dead. It's been quite some time since we last met."

"I'll answer your questions, if you'll answer one of my first." Ryoga replied, eerily calm.

"I suppose that's fair enough." 

"Cologne what is your primary goal?" Ryoga said smugly.

"Very amusing." Cologne said chuckling heartily. 

"I really want to know." The coldness in his voice stiffening the words.

"Very well, for Ranma to marry Shampoo so we can have peace at last and I can return to China."

"That's not true. I want the truth, not anything less." Ryoga angrily retorted. 

"What makes you think my answer isn't true?" The Amazon Matriarch asked.

"I've thought about it after talking to Ranma. Your answer doesn't match your actions."

"You?! Talk to Ranma?! Besides, "Prepare to die?" Please tell me another one." Cologne joked.

"I'll explain it if you wish." Ryoga replied sternly his eyes narrowing.

Cologne closely examined Ryoga. "Perhaps I've misjudged you, you seem serious." She muttered.

"When you first arrived here, you were far and away better than any of us. How hard would of it for you to have simply taken Ranma by force? Two or three swift strikes and you could have killed the Tendos or anyone else that would have opposed you."

"Power must be tempered with wisdom, Ryoga. Besides, if I forced Ranma to return, it would be more than likely he'd hate my tribe."

"Good will then? Then why torture him with the Full Bodied Cat tongue and taunt him with the Phoenix pill? Why not just kill them all and force him to drink a love concoction of some sort? I told you I've thought this through completely." Ryoga explained devoid of emotion, but a hint of anger.

The lost boy paused for a second then continued to rant. "Why teach him things like the Kachuu Tenshin Amaguriken or Hiryuu Shoten Ha? Why didn't you extort him for learning your precious knowledge? Why didn't you say I'd help you learn the Hiryuu Shoten Ha and get your strength back, if you'll agree to a marriage to Shampoo? Are you ready to tell me your real goal now or do you want to keep playing games?"

The ancient amazon and lost boy spent a long silent moment regarding each other.

"So what do you think my goal is, Ryoga? Obviously you don't believe what I told you."

"Ranma told me something minor once. He said you didn't hear him sneak up on you about the first time you two met. I think your so-called laws are relatively meaningless. It's the spirit of the law that matters—the question is he worthy of your tribe? Anyone could get lucky and beat Shampoo once. I think when you first met him, you were impressed but unsure if he was worthy."

"So what to do to find out if he's worthy of your tribe or not? Well, test him of course. Get him stuck as a girl, because he hates his curse more than anything else, then test him with the cure. Train idiot me to fight him with a powerful trick and see if he's able to improvise enough to win. See if he can master more complicated moves like the Hiryuu Shoten Ha. It has all been a test, from the moment you got here."

"Is that all then?" Cologne replied stiffly.

"One more thing. I don't think Shampoo had much to do with this entire matter. I think you are at heart a teacher, and Ranma had potential you couldn't deny once he was brought to your attention. You wanted him in your tribe more than anything else because of this untapped talent."

"Well, you know more than I'd ever have given you credit for. But you are wrong, this was a test for Shampoo was well. I've misjudged you, Ryoga. I won't underestimate you again. Are you for me or against me?"

"I am "for" Akane...and R-Ranma too. I want them to be happy, because they deserve it more than anyone I know. Everything...everyone seems against them. Well, damn it, not anymore. I am for them."

"Then you are against me." Cologne said sternly.

"No, we don't have to be at odds. Here, look at this." Ryoga said, brandishing a piece of paper. The Amazon Matriarch accepted it cautiously. 

"What is this?" she said scanning the words. "A contract?"

"If I understand it right, it is some sort of application to join your tribe legally."

"Why on earth would Ranma join my tribe this way?"

"The papers extent to both Ranma and Akane. Both you and they reach their goals this way. You get Ranma in your tribe, and Ranma loses unwanted baggage." Ryoga explained.

"Baggage?"

"If Ranma is no longer an outsider to your tribe, then the Kiss of Death and the Kiss of Marriage no longer apply to him, do they? The same with Akane in the case of the former."

"I see, this is an admirable solution though I think it is too late." Cologne said wistfully. 

"Too late?"

"I don't feel that Shampoo would surrender her claim so easily."

"If she loses your backing, I think she might reconsider. If she doesn't I'll make her understand." Ryoga said growling the second sentence.

"Make Shampoo understand what, pig boy?" Shampoo's innocent voice asked, with just a hint of annoyance in it. 

Ryoga turned to see Shampoo emerging from their restaurant. Predictably Mousse followed behind. Equally predictably Shampoo didn't seem to notice he existed.

"I agree, it's done Ryoga, but you have to convince her to surrender her hunt." Cologne said slyly, chuckling and stepping back to see how her granddaughter reacted. _She mentioned a test before..._

"Shampoo," Ryoga said, teeth clenched, "Your laws no longer apply to Ranma. He's been accepted as part of your tribe. You can go home now and leave Ranma and Akane alone."

"That's great news! Let's go home Shampoo and we can..." Mousse said before being silenced by Shampoo.

"Duck boy stay out of this." Shampoo said. Turning to Ryoga she said "It no matter."

"What doesn't matter?"

"Shampoo love Ranma much more than violent girl. That all that matter."

"How stupid can you be? Don't you understand I loved Akane too? Ukyo loved Ranma. Just like Mousse misguided as he may be loves you. It doesn't matter. It never mattered. All that matters is Ranma loves Akane and Akane loves Ranma. Love is mutual, and for all wishes we will never have any love, but unrequited." _Just a few more moments to dawn._

"If Shampoo wins Ranma, then maybe Pig boy will get Akane." Shampoo said slyly.

"I want Akane to be happy. In the end that's all that matters to me. I've realized I will never be able to make her as happy as Ranma can." Ryoga announced the first rays of morning light shinning on him, making Ryoga seem if he was glowing .

"But Shampoo love Ran..."

"You don't love him. If you did, you'd want let him make his choice and abide by it, and not resort to magic to coerce him. You are nothing more than petty and selfish." Ryoga said his voice as caustic as acid.

While Shampoo fumed, Mousse closed in towards Ryoga.

"You take that back about her." The Chinese boy shouted. As he came face to face with Ryoga, Ryoga merely produced a document and handed it to Mousse.

"If you sign this you'll renounce your allegiance to your tribe. Do that, then you'll be an outsider. Then challenge Shampoo; she'll have to accept you. You don't have to fight her today, I'll train you." Ryoga explained. "I bet Ranma would help too." Ryoga added as an afterthought. 

Mousse looked at Shampoo and then looked at the ground. "You don't understand, Ryoga. It's not that easy. I can't bring myself to hurt Shampoo, I love her. I refuse."

"Shampoo no care what pig boy says. If he no smart enough to help me and get Akane, then it Pig boy own fault. Shampoo win Ranma by self."

"Then you leave me no choice." Ryoga said bleakly. "I challenge you. If I win, you leave Ranma and Akane alone for good. If you win, I won't interfere with you."

"Pig boy must think Shampoo stupid. Shampoo no agree when Shampoo no have no real reason to."

Reaching Ryoga pondered what she said Ryoga found himself baffled. _Shampoo needs a reason to fight me? I need something she wants. Or something she can't refuse. Her honor, her code of laws, that is where I must strike._

"I'll challenge for your hand in marriage then. How would you like that? Then flee and force you to chase me to the ends of the earth, wasn't that how your law goes? With my since of direction, you will really will see the ends of the earth." Ryoga sarcastically said with a wolfish grin on his face. Shampoo's face shown with outrage her arms being pushed down to the sides of her body stiffly. "This sordid affair began through combat, let us end it through fighting as well. Which offer to you accept?"

"Very well, Shampoo defeat you and then pursue Ranma. No get lost while Shampoo get weapons." Shampoo deftly entered the cafe.

Ryoga pensively thought, _She almost moves like a cat. How ironic that's her curse. _Further considering the train of thought, _Mousse is awkward around Shampoo, like a duck on land. And I ,well I am a pig. How ironic indeed._

"I won't allow you to hurt her, you know that, don't you?" Mousse threatened.

"Stay out of this, or you'll get hurt, Mousse. This is the path she's forced me down." Ryoga said harshly.

Before either youth could speak again, Shampoo emerged from the Cafe with a sword in one hand, a mace in the other. Ryoga prepared himself, there would be no quarter in this battle.

*

*

"I'll give you one last warning." Ryoga said gravely. "I am not going to hold back anything."

Shampoo smiled, her eyes glimmering like a sprite. The amazon girl moved into a defensive crouch.

"Very well, you leave my no other choice." Ryoga muttered. _No recourse and no mercy--what would Ranma do? Exploit weakness, and no matter what win. I won't let her trick me. I won't even listen to what she says._

Shampoo sprung forward, cold malice shinning in her eyes.

Focusing the darkness that plagued his soul, Ryoga shouted "Shishi houkou-dan". The ki blast shined like the light of redemption. Shampoo's charge was cut short and she was flung like a rag doll against a building. Ryoga tried to block out the cry of pain he heard escape her lips. _Victory at any cost. I've got to believe what I am doing is right._

Mousse rushed into a headlong charge at Ryoga, screaming unintelligently. Ryoga stood his ground and the two locked exchanging a flurry of blows in quick succession. 

"Mousse, give up, I don't want to hurt you."

"Worry about your own hide." He snapped. Mousse leapt backwards unleashing a half a dozen knives. Ryoga spun quickly deflecting the blades with his red bamboo umbrella, one however managed to graze his right arm. Biting back the pain, Ryoga sprung forward and had closed into melee range.

"Bakusai-ten-ketsu!" the lost boy yelled as his fingers brushed the ground. The explosion roared shattering the stillness of the early morning air. As the earth rumbled, rock and dirt were thrown into the air creating a cloud of dust to obscure sight. Ryoga focused his other senses besides sight and struck hard and fast against Mousse. The shock of the blow knocked Mousse back several feet. Panting, Ryoga caught glimpse of something out of the corner of his eye.

Ryoga spun just in time to avoid Shampoo's sword from penetrating his back. She had overextended herself in her death seeking attacking, and Ryoga exploited this mistake to its fullest. He struck without mercy hitting her hard and quickly aiming for her abdomen. She fell back from the hits, and staggered to her knees. Her eyes gleamed with fury and pain. _She's crying. Why couldn't she just give up. Why couldn't have this gone a different way..._

"Yield, you can't win. Please end this." Ryoga said coldly. _We need to end this before someone really gets hurt. No more violence, I've seen enough of that._

Ryoga felt the chains wrap around his body restricting his movement. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Mousse struggling to keep him immobilized. Shampoo slowly began to force herself to her feet, her sword drawn...

Time began to slow down as he watched this scene unfold, still struggling in vain. _This is it. This is where I fail. I die. I came so close. I am sorry A-Akane...and Ranma. I hope you succeed where I tried...No, _his mind raced. _I've suffered to long to fail my friends now! I refuse. I reject this fate! I make my own destiny! _The darkness of his soul manifested itself as a bright red battle aura engulfed him. 

"Perfected Shishi houkou-dan!" Ryoga yelled at the top of his lungs. The ground began to shake as the energy released itself. Dancing motes of light circled Ryoga and they began to rise quickly towards the sky forming a pillar of red light. Loose bolts in near by buildings rattled under the force that was focusing itself, playing an anthem to the destruction that was about to take place. In the span of less than a second there was a calm as the energy left the ground racing for the heavens. The peace of eye of this storm lasted only a moment. Then energy began to come tumbling uncontrollably downward. It raced forth impacting a radius that easily hitting all three youths and crushing them under the terrible force of the energy. The sound of the impact of energy and earth was deafening. He coughed and hacked as the smell of ozone assaulted his senses. Ryoga staggered under the force of his own technique, but remained standing. _Why is it hurting me? I guess I've not rid myself of all my ki. That's the only reason I can think of why it struck me. _A crater large as a car in had formed where they energy has collided with earth. 

Ryoga felt the chains that bound him loosen in the aftermath of the blast. Shampoo had collapsed to her knees, head facing downward. _It's over, I've ended it._ Suddenly she twitched ever so slightly. _No, I can't show mercy. As long as she can fight she will. I have to end this one way or another. I need to be like Ranma, victory at any cost. No quarter, no room for compassion in a soul of ice. _A dark red mist encircled Ryoga, its cloudy tendrils forming a second skin. 

"Perfected Shishi houkou-dan!" he screamed like a battle cry. Again, Ryoga felt the energy surge around him as it made its way upward, forming a pillar of glowing red light. The rubble around the site, loosen by the first blast, was drawn into the influx of energy as it raced skyward. Ryoga struggled to breathe, as the very air seemed to be sucked into the vortex. A fleeting moment of tranquillity interrupted this awesome display. Ryoga closed his eyes, bracing for impact, knowing this moment would be all too brief. Then the energy fell earthward, dropping lower than before. The sound of the blast was a thunderclap, echoing and reverberating for miles around. Pain lanced through Ryoga's frame, and again he staggered, but maintained his balance. The stench of ozone stained the air.

Without opening his eyes, Ryoga focused his thoughts, to no avail. Feverishly he mused _I won't lose. No not this time. I have win for my friend's happiness. _The warmth of his battle aura surrounded him. He could feel the sweet taste of raw power, waiting to be unleashed. It seduced him and he felt his aura flare. _This will be the greatest blast ever. I will..._

A stiff object impacted jarred his concentration. Slowly Ryoga opened his eyes. He saw Cologne starring at him, her staff against his chest.

"Enough Ryoga. You've defeated them." Ryoga looked closely at Shampoo slumped over and unconscious. Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed the same was true Mousse. The Amazon Matriarch muttered, "It's been decided at last."


	7. Epilogue and Concluding Thoughts

Epilogue

*

*

"Happiness is as a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond your grasp, but which if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you." Nathaniel Hawthorne 

*

*

Ryoga staggered away from the make shift battlefield. The weight of his injuries weighted heavily upon his body, but the lightness of his spirit easily washed the pain away. _Done, it's done. Finally...they can do things at their own pace, no more interlopers. _

Slowly Ryoga raised microphone speaker to his mouth spoke into it. "Nabiki, it's over. Not the way we planned, but still done. Don't tell them my part in this."

"Great, I'll give you directions to the doj..."

"I am not coming back. I'll mail you your device." Ryoga said his voice devoid of feeling, flipping the machine off.

Ryoga walked slowly, letting his sense of direction guide him and his thoughts remain blank. _There is a type of beauty in wandering aimless...I am free—free of guilt, free of dread, free to embrace the future without regret._

Ryoga walked to the edge of a bridge, suspended over a canal. He stood there alone, not a soul in sight, basking in the sunlight and watching his reflection. Idly and pensively he remembered seeing his reflection in the koi pond at the Tendo home. _I look the same, but there's something different too. I can't place it..._

Footsteps shattered his reverie. He turned to his friend, rival, and so much more standing on the opposite end of the bridge.

"Ranma, farewell." Ryoga called to his friend, simply, but with sincerity that implied permanency.

"You don't have to leave."

"I do. Actually, I've got one last favor to ask of you."

"Anything. What is it?"

"Don't make her wait too long."

Without another word, Ryoga turned his back on Ranma and his past in Nerima and slowly walked towards the sun. Suddenly it struck Ryoga, what was different about his reflection.

_Am I happy? Are my friends? I've been so focused on atoning that I've almost made a much graver mistake_. 

Ryoga slowly unbuckled the shoulder pads he wore and tossed them into the canal, casting aside physical and emotional burdens simultaneously. With a wolfish grin he shattered the silence, "Ranma, want to spar next week? Can't have you growing rusty can we?" The smile that greeted him assured Ryoga, he had made the right choice.

*

*

Concluding Thoughts

This final section is perhaps an explanation of why I wrote this story and how the idea for it formed. It contains spoilers, though I doubt anyone that's reading fanfiction isn't intimately informed. 

The idea for this story was based upon as you've probably guessed Ryoga. Originally I was greatly impressed with his actions during the Wedding scene at the end of the manga. Now, I've not been lucky enough to actually read it, but my understanding is while Shampoo/Ukyo/Kodachi/Kuno interfered with the wedding so to speak, Ryoga just sat there depressed. Granted not the ideal action, but at the same time that's quite a lot of growth from the early Ryoga.

As I looked back I noted several instances where Ryoga had character growth. Early on Ryoga tries to "win" Akane in the Bakusai-ten-ketsu story, but later on he has changed quite a bit. Ryoga doesn't try to kill Ranma(unlike Mousse/Kuno/Principal Kuno) when he is weak in the Hiryuu shouten-ha story, and even defends him. In that story, Shishi houkou-dan, and in the Mark of the Gods story lines, Ryoga did not try to "win" Akane even though he could have certainly had a chance at beating Ranma in the first two stories and would have won without a doubt in the last one. This is starkly in contrast to the Bakusai-ten-ketsu story, making his personal growth obvious. During the Ryugenzawa story arc, Ryoga has an interesting speech that basically says even though he's always been nothing more than a friend to Akane, he still will help her in that battle against that monster. This is used to goad Ranma, but at the same time I thought it spoke volumes about his character growth. Likewise the "Red Thread of Dread" arc and OVA 6 "The One to Carry On", Ryoga is torn between helping Akane to be happy and having her fail to be happy, but him having a better chance with her. Both times he fails to make the decision in her favor; however, he agonizes over it. The early Ryoga would have simply seized these opportunities. 

His actions seem premeditated not a fluke in the ending of the series. Thus, I felt the potential to write a story that has Ryoga come to terms with what he should do. This story was my attempt to reach that end, though Ryoga's dark outlook on life created an atmosphere that weakened the believability of the entire story. It uses characters from the series, but it's not what Ranma ½ should be. Hopefully, it isn't too terrible for a first attempt. If I get motivated anytime soon perhaps I'll develop another idea out into a story.

Lastly I'd like to thank the following people for their insights, Solomon's Nightmare, Silver, Lord Cirenmas, Edhunne, Echo, libhranan, Kawaii Kitsune, Luz, and anyone else that I've missed. 


End file.
